#so had it not been for being tadpoled if they were just a tav + gortash meeting she would have probably agreed to his deal

[silksworn]

// only a lil subby when the whips come out <3

I’d say ‘soulmates’ if either of them believed in a notion that romantic or saccharine

[bluebeary-jay]

A promise softly sung

Astarion x f!Reader/Tav

Summary: before the battle that will decide his fate, Astarion is terrified of losing you to Cazador. you comfort him after a nightmare. (set at the beginning of act 3)

Tags: hurt/comfort, BIG angst and some fluff, poor boy doesn't believe he's deserving of love :( let's hold him until he changes his mind

Warnings: mentions of trauma, self-deprecating thoughts, memories of past abuse and torture, c*zador, being unable to move (briefly), tadpoles mention (idk if that's a trigger)

Word count: 2.1k

A/N: hiiiiiiiii my darlings <33 soo this is something else from what i usually write but i finished bg3 recently and i LOVED IT but i'm on a trip rn so in the absence of my pc i found some inner inspiration to write something again. honestly i missed writing very much but i had the biggest block for almost a year now but maybe it'll get better now that my classes are starting again and i'll be needing a distraction lmao. anyway comments and reblogs are always greatly appreciated and don't be shy to send in a request! and as always, happy reading!!! <3

He was there again.

Astarion loathed those hard, stone walls as much as he feared them. It was here that he once spent an entire night, having infernal script meticulously carved into his skin. It was here that he was punished every time he disappointed his master, every time he didn’t do well enough on his mission. It was here that he was reminded time and time again how worthless, pathetic and meaningless his existence was. It was here he returned in almost all of his nightmares.

But now you were here, too.

Astarion couldn’t believe this, but no matter how much he blinked or willed himself to wake up, the view before his eyes didn’t change. It was you, chained by the wrists to the ceiling where he was hanging so many times before, your toes just barely scraping the ground that was already splattered with your blood. Your clothes were ripped to shreds and cuts and bruises covered almost every inch of your skin. Astarion wanted to run up to you, to get you somewhere safe and far away from this place, but he found that he was unable to move. It wasn’t shock seizing up his limbs, but magical paralysis which he had experienced a couple of times during combat. Even though he knew it was a spell that was holding him in place, he still fought against it with all the strength he could muster – but to no avail.

Your eyes, full of tears and fear, met his briefly before you looked past him at someone else.

“Ah, my sweet, insolent boy,” whispered a voice straight from Astarion’s deepest, darkest nightmares, causing him to tense up in terror. A hand – pale, all too familiar in its deceptive tenderness – brushed his jaw from behind before grabbing his hair roughly. The vampire spawn could do nothing but watch as his head was tilted back and he came face to face with his master.

No, it can’t be… How was Cazador here? How were you here?!

“You’ve been a very bad boy, Astarion,” Cazador tutted, shaking his head. “Running away like that, not returning home for months… It’s no way to treat family, isn’t it?” Astarion felt a sharp sting of his master’s quarterstaff at his back, digging into the scars made by the same hand, but he couldn’t move, couldn’t even scream. “But I’ll forgive you… eventually. After all, you brought me this delectable treat…”

Both him and Cazador looked up at you when Astarion realized what – or rather, who – that bastard was talking about. He tried shaking his head, tried begging for him not to hurt you, but he still couldn’t move, his voice was still stuck past his throat and no word or sound came out. In the meantime, Cazador stood up, walking around his spawn to stand in front of you.

“His own survival was always the most important thing to him,” Cazador said almost pitifully, and only after a moment Astarion realized that this time, he was speaking to you. “He’s a selfish, contemptuous creature, after all. Say, did he tell you he loved you before he lured you here like so many others before you? Did he lie, swearing how much you mean to him?”

“Yes, he… he did.”

Astarion prayed to any higher being that it was just the power of another spell compelling you to say that, and not what you were really thinking. He tried to struggle against his own magical restraints, but whatever scroll or verbal command was used, it was far too powerful for the vampire to beat it with sheer willpower alone. He was helpless again – but worse than that, he was forced to watch you being at Cazador’s mercy, too, all while he couldn’t do anything to save you.

“I honestly didn’t think poor Astarion had it in him,” Cazador continued calmly, gliding gracefully around you and disappearing behind your back. Your own eyes, now full of hurt and betrayal, were trained on Astarion’s. He couldn’t turn away, but in the corner of his vision the elf saw a flash of a blade against your bare skin. “To give away one person who, for some strange reason, saw good in a filthy worm like him… But I’m so very proud of you, sweetling.” Cazador looked at him over your shoulder and licked his lips, so, so dangerously close to your neck. “You’ll live to serve me for centuries to come, and you can watch your lover take your place in my ritual… You did well, Astarion.”

No, Astarion cried in the prison of his own body, unable to reach you or to even stop Cazador from spilling lies into your ears. Not her, no, no, please–

“No!”

Cazador smiled widely and sank his teeth into your fragile neck, and you screamed, still looking at Astarion with this horrible hatred in your eyes…

“No, no, please! Take me, please, just don’t–”

“My love, it’s alright, you’re safe…”

“Stop! Please, just–!”

His body suddenly jerked painfully and his eyes shot open, darting around in confusion and trying to figure out where he was. Astarion wasn’t feeling the cold frigid air of the kennels anymore – instead his skin was almost hot, and damp from sweat, but there was something smooth and soft under his back… the sheets. He was in a bed, at an inn. Still panting heavily, he looked around, noting the details in his surroundings: the crooked chandelier, a little window with curtains drawn shut, his shirt hung neatly over the back of the chair… and your shoes right next to it.

At the memory of your battered and tortured body in Cazador’s dungeon, Astarion shot up with a belated sob, almost knocking you over in the process. Only when your warm hand left his cheek did he notice your presence. You were kneeling next to him on the mattress, expression worried and sorrowful, with the last traces of sleep just leaving the edge of your vision. His red eyes scanned your body, but there were no bruises, no cuts made by Cazador’s wretched blade, no burns on your wrists from the manacles he saw you in mere moments ago.

And there was no hatred in your gaze. Only love and care he didn’t deserve.

Astarion’s eyes filled with tears, but before he could run out of the room or hide under the bed, you opened your arms, gently offering him the solace within. And he, being the selfish, contemptuous creature that he was, didn’t deny himself what he wasn’t worthy of.

“It’s okay,” you whispered, petting his hair softly, while the other hand was – as always – mindful of the scars on his back. “It was a dream, my love. You’re safe here with us.”

His body shook with quiet sobs as he buried his face in the crook of your neck, inhaling the soothing scent of your skin and your blood singing to him just beneath. He saw again before his eyes the way Cazador looked at him before he bit you, right in this place he was now so close to…

To give away one person who, for some strange reason, saw good in a filthy worm like him…

“I’m sorry,” Astarion choked out, finding his voice at last, which made you pause in your ministrations. “I’m so sorry f-for not doing anything… He…”

You were quiet for a couple of seconds, but then Astarion felt the most tender touch of your lips on the crown of his head, and he buried his face more into your chest.

“I’m here, darling,” you whispered. “Whatever you saw, it wasn’t real.”

He didn’t answer, instead lifting his arm and tentatively brushing his fingers just underneath your shirt. He didn’t feel any scars mirroring his own, but could still see the blood flowing from your back and down your legs, could still hear your painful scream… It brought fresh tears to his eyes again.

“I… I swear, I would never do that,” he attempted to explain himself, but his words came out in a pathetic sob, and he shook his head again, curling in on himself. “He– he was lying. I’d never…”

A fresh wave of tears wetted your shirt, but you didn’t seem to mind as you gently rocked him back and forth, cradling him safe in your arms. Old Astarion would probably scoff at the condescending action of being treated like an infant, but he knew better now. He still found it difficult, but with you at his side he was learning what true care and affection looked like, and how to accept it. You were always so patient with him, so gentle, never rushing or angry when he couldn’t give you the closeness and intimacy you deserved. Astarion loved that about you – even if he wasn’t ready to say it out loud just yet.

“My star…” you hesitated, but ultimately asked, “what did you dream about?”

The vampire took a shaky breath, unable to open his eyes or speak about what he saw. Instead, he called on the tadpole in his brain and nudged your mind with it, wordlessly asking for permission, which you immediately granted. There was at least one thing the tadpole was good for, he thought as you lived through the nightmare his weak, broken mind had conjured. If by the gods’ grace all of them managed to get rid of the tadpoles and survive this whole ordeal… and if by some miracle you still wanted to stay with him after all was done… Astarion knew he would have to learn how to communicate his feelings on his own. But not tonight. Not tonight.

You didn’t say anything for a long while, only continuing to hold him close to your chest. In this position he could hear the soothing beat of your heart, proving that he didn’t lead you to Cazador, that he didn’t turn you into a monster like him…

“We’re gonna kill him,” you finally said with your throat tight from emotions. “I promise you, as soon as we get to the Baldur’s Gate, we’ll find him and end him for good.”

Astarion knew what he should say – he should agree, or maybe jest that this is the most romantic thing you’ve ever said, or even argue that it’s not going to be that easy.

But all he could do right now was to continue clinging to you like a child, too afraid to face you.

“I’d never give you away,” he breathed, so quietly that he wasn’t sure you heard it, but he didn’t care. “Even if I had to suffer another two hundred years. I’d never–”

“I know, my darling,” you whispered back, and Astarion felt your own tears disappearing in his white locks. He still couldn’t believe why someone like you would waste your tears on him of all people, and it caused a new kind of pain to bloom in his chest. “And you’re not those things he told you. You’re… you’re everything to me, Astarion. Everything.”

Astarion wondered if he’d ever believe that. You proved to him time and time again that you can make anything possible, even change the worldview of someone like him… but with Cazador’s threat still looming, he didn’t have it in him to try and convince himself of your words.

Maybe after the bastard's dead, he concluded. Maybe then it’ll get easier and he can finally start becoming someone deserving of you.

You stirred slightly, breaking him out of his musings. Astarion hugged you tighter, sharply stopping you from moving away.

“Please. Don’t go.”

You just leaned back on the pillow and kissed his head gently again. Astarion felt the tension in his body melting away just a little, but the tears welled up again in his eyes.

“I won’t. Promise.”

And you kept your promise. Astarion didn’t fall asleep again, but your constant heartbeat under his cheek brought him some semblance of peace as he waited for the sun to rise. It didn’t feel right to let you care for him so much, to gift and envelop him with your love that he didn’t deserve… But it’d be even more wrong to take that choice away from you. He knew all about that, after all, and he'll be damned if he ever treats you the way he was treated.

So Astarion decided that he will let you love him and he will love you in return, for as long as you allow it.

Because, truth be told, he was nothing if not a selfish, contemptuous creature.

[autistichalsin]

Masterpost of cut content, changes, and etc for early game builds of Halsin

I have found a lot of cut things relating to Halsin, some from developer interviews, a lot from the datamine, and some from other sources. I decided to compile those here.

Some disclaimers and clarifications first:

I use the term "early build(s)" to distinguish it from both release and from the Early Access test period. If you don't remember something here, it's because it was removed without ever being implemented in Early Access.

I do not have the energy to link or upload the datamined files, etc, so instead I will state where I found them and you are free to look if you want to.

This list is not exhaustive. There are likely even more things that we will never know about.

The game underwent many, many rewrites; some characters existed in ways you would not recognize today, before being rewritten.

I am not including things that were changed after release, IE the unfinished Halsin vs Minthara ultimatum that started to be worked on from patches 4-6 but was never implemented.

With that said, let's jump in! I will try to organize these roughly in order of how early the game build was, but it's not always possible to know how far back a given change was, so it won't be precise.

If I missed any, please feel free to let me know!

Halsin wasn't always the only Archdruid at the Emerald Grove; there was once a second Archdruid, Denor, who worshipped Eldath. She and Halsin had a fight because she was worried about the Shadow-Cursed Lands, and she went off to investigate a lead and got captured, presumably leading Halsin to try and go save her. Likely to simplify that plot, they instead made the Grove solely consist of Druids of Silvanus, and Halsin and Denor's plots were combined into just Halsin. (This was recovered from datamined files.)

Halsin used to be an elderly man; this has been confirmed by both Kevin (writer of Lae'zel and Wyll) and John (Halsin's writer). Halsin's pipe is an artifact from this time, which they never removed. This caused a lot of confusion for the writers when Halsin got de-aged to what we know today, causing a lot of fans in Early Access to thirst for him, as the last the writers had seen, he was, well, an old man. There were streams at this time with writers explaining they had been baffled at first until they saw Halsin's then-new model.

Listening to old voice files from back when each Tav narrated their own story, Halsin originally had two bear companions, a male and a female, who were mates. It was possible to cause both Halsin and one of the bears to die at the goblin camp, leaving the other bear heartbroken at losing both their mate and their master.

Halsin had a friend, the cut Origin character Helia, and they would have been imprisoned together. (This was recovered from datamined files.) Helia had two recruitment locations, one in the forest and one in the worg pens, and in fact there is still text in the post-release file for the worg pen scene mentioning it could be her or Halsin there. Her recruitment dialogue mentioned that goblins had taken Halsin away (more on that below) and it seems (though not confirmed, but just putting pieces together) that which location Helia was recruited from would influence where you found Halsin; if you found her in the forest, he'd be in the goblin cage, but if you missed Helia there and found her in the pens, he'd be taken to Moonrise. Leading to...

It was possible for Halsin to be imprisoned in Moonrise. There was an audio file recovered where Minthara would mention the Druid the player was looking for was there and she could get them an audience with him, and there are multiple tags referring to Halsin being imprisoned in a pod (such as a dialogue option to leave him in his pod), as well as an eventflag suggesting Halsin could have been tadpoled. More specifically, there was a flag set for saving Halsin before he was tadpoled, which by implication also strongly hints he could have been tadpoled there. There was also a cut dialogue line from an unknown character (possibly, but not certainly, Helia or a Druid) saying, "Halsin! What did they do to you???" which also hints at this. Another line said, "easy, Halsin. We're all friends here," and was removed at the same time that all references to this outcome were, suggesting it was part of that same path. (Possibly tadpoled Halsin would have been disoriented and aggressive, causing the player to need to reassure him they're friendly, though that is sheer speculation on my part.)

As shown in the concept art book, Halsin's scar used to, in fact, be from a battle, instead of being attacked for rejecting a she-bear's advances.

As is very well-known by now, Halsin was responsible for Isobel's death. Rather than being promoted to Archdruid after the battle, he was always in charge, and represented the Druids and Harpers in a negotiation attempt with Ketheric. Instead, some unknown force (believed to be Shar) caused Isobel and other combatants to go temporarily insane and attack each other. She attacked Halsin, and he immediately reacted in self-defense, stabbing her with the glaive Sorrow. He believed it became cursed as a result, because holding it filled him with such sadness, and anyone who used it would take psychic damage as well. Essentially, his trauma and regret from killing her was so great that it gained a physical form in the blade. Further, that was the main reason for his guilt regarding the Shadow-Cursed Lands, leading to...

Halsin's friendship with Thaniel was a later addition. Before, Halsin only mentioned having seen him briefly in his meditations; he wanted to save Thaniel because it would break the curse over the land, not because it was Thaniel himself.

Halsin's mission in act 2 was much bigger, and was trimmed significantly as a result- being far too big for an optional sidequest for a non-Origin character. Instead of waking Art Cullagh to get information on the Shadowfell, you fought the three Thorms to get a bone from each of them, which you would then bring to Isobel, who would grind them up for use in a ritual. Then you would defend Halsin while he tried to open the portal (more on the portal below), instead of defending him while he was inside it. You were then instructed to go to the Shar temple to wait for him, after which the quest would presumably end with Halsin, overjoyed and grateful beyond words for your help, bringing Thaniel to recover in Last Light and promising light would return to the lands soon.

During this quest, Halsin would also give you a dagger called Promise, which would help him find you from the Shadowfell. He also mentioned that a sign of his spirit would manifest itself in the Shar temple when the player had found the right place. That's where the "you are the beacon that will guide me home" line likely originated from.

The portal quest was different, as noted above. Most notably, there are still files in-game for a scenario where, despite being warned repeatedly not to touch the portal, you could wait for him to open it and then attempt to enter, causing it to collapse. Horrified and heartbroken, Halsin would yell at you, and you could give an explanation ranging from "sorry I panicked" to "I worship Shar and didn't want you to succeed, hahaha dumbass." Halsin, heartbroken, would leave to be alone to grieve, and then would leave you forever.

Oliver was likely not a part of this quest originally; he, along with Art's story, were added when the quest got trimmed down from what it had been, but still needed some little quest progressions, so they tweaked the story to give it some meat back without making it such a daunting quest as it was before.

There was once going to be a scene of Halsin and Jaheira having a very heated argument during act 2. What it was about, and how it would have ended, has never been discovered; the only thing we know is the title of the file from an early datamine. It is possible it could have been about Jaheira learning about Halsin's responsibility for Isobel's death, as she is shown in canon to be protective of Isobel, or it could be about their different priorities over whether the cult or the curse should be a priority.

Worth noting here are various changes to characterization (rather than noting every single one individually). Halsin was more openly emotional (particularly after you saved Thaniel), often sassier, and his abilities as a healer were emphasized more strongly back then. He teased you about if the tadpole would share your hangover the day after the party, he would dryly say he can't cut your tadpole out or he'd be removing it from a corpse, etc. It is also possible, though has never been confirmed, that we might have been intended to learn his last name of Silverbough at some point, as John has mentioned an earlier character outline having said that as his last name, in reference to Celtic mythology.

Halsin had voice lines referencing Orpheus; you could mention him to Halsin, and he would mention he wanted to meet anyone who knew about these tadpoles.

Halsin's sex scene with him wildshaping into a bear seems to have once been intended for a different scene where the wildshaping occurred offscreen and was also played for laughs; this was pitched by Baudelaire Welch, and then John Corcoran turned it into a part of the main romance. What that original pitch was, what the context would have been, etc, are not known. Just that the wildshaping was originally an offscreen gag in another scene. (Possibly Sharess' Caress?)

There were going to be scenes, near the end of the game, where the elder brain would torment the group with hallucinations of themselves that would pick at their weaknesses, fears and insecurities; these files still exist in rough draft form in the game. Halsin's particular hallucination would have hinted at his struggles with feelings of meaningless, and his wondering whether he should just give up, etc.

There is also a voice line that still exists for characters who were in your party, but left either due to plot events or their approval dropping, being captured by the Absolute and showing up to fight against you in the courtyard battle. Halsin was included here as well, being an enemy who would yell "For the Absolute!" at the start of his turns.

It is possible, though not certain, that the writers intended for you to be able to bring Halsin back to act 1; he and Minthara both have voice lines for the creche. However, it is possible that this was just added to cover the exploit where casting silence on either of them would leave them unable to initiate their scene where they refuse to return with you.

I hesitate to include this one, as I have yet to find anything even remotely concrete (the closest things being an ambiguous tag and the circumstantial evidence of there being many hanging plot threads), but it is widely believed that there was supposed to be a continuation of the Shadow Druids plot which would center around Halsin, based on Halsin's uncertainty in act 3 of whether they might actually be right, a tag referencing Kagha's act 1 turn from the Shadow Druids if this happened, a line from the Shadow Druids mentioning they were going to Baldur's Gate, and the reveal that Ketheric had the Shadow Druids sent to the Grove to weaken the Drudis there as he knew from experience what a threat they could be.

Hope you enjoyed that deep dive! I don't THINK I forgot anything, but on the off chance I did, do feel free to let me know and I will update this post!

[thewritetofreespeech]

I really think Gale needs to know that he is competent and good at things even without his magic/ without doing his magic.

Gale× woman girlfriend tav where they have soft sex and Gale want to enhance the experience with his magic, but reader shows him that he doesn't need to.

---------------------------🟣----------------------------------

When Tav told him that she loved him back, he thought his chest might explode from just pure excitement & relief. Not the orb.

He had been fairly certain that Tav felt the same as him. Mentally reviewed all their moments together. Stolen glances. That moment in the Weave that still seemed to linger on his fingertips even now. But one was never sure of these things until they happened. And given how his last ‘grand gesture’ had ended, Gale was nervous that this would be another defeat as well. Yet to be accepted, to be loved in return by someone he respected & admired again, Gale could die a happy man. Should the right moment Elminster spoke of was to come.

For now, however, he wanted to focus on the now. He wanted it to be perfect. A vision, just like Tav was to him. To show her how deep his affection was for her, even with their short time together. He had it all planned. To show her his home. To show him where he found the most peace and solace when not at her side. Then to make love in the way of the gods by a perfect mending of souls & mind. It would be perfect.

Yet when he told Tav of his plan, she denied him. Saying that she didn’t want illusions, just him.

“Are you sure?” Gale was caught off guard by her response. Expecting that, when offered the opportunity to experience what so few mortals could, she would jump at the chance. Even with his limitations on the Weave between the tadpole and Mystra’s bars, Gale knew he could get them close to his experience in the heavens. He wanted that for both of them. More than what these simple husks of flesh could bide them. “I can do more than woo you. I could wow you.”

Tav chuckled at his comment. Amused, even though he was being totally serious, and reaffirmed that she wanted the man, not the magic.

Gale was entirely nervous at this point but tried not to show it. He had a plan and all that was out the window. What was he supposed to do now?? The wizard endeavored to stay calm and continue with at least the original plan of being with Tav. He didn’t know if they would have a moment like this again and he would be gods damned if he was going to waste it.

Conjuring just a small bit of magic for a bed, as his back would never recover from making love on the hard ground, Gale smiled when he saw Tav fall back on it playfully. She was always so funny. This odd kind of silly mixed with bravery. Gale couldn’t remember the last time he had been with someone who was silly. Mystra was always so serious, and her wizard acolytes from his school days were no different.

He watched Tav sit up on the bed. Beckoning him over with a look and gesture of her hand that held more magic in it to command than any spell Gale could conjure. He had to obey.

Climbing onto the bed with her, Gale leaned in to kiss Tav a second time. Deeper than the first. Her lips were soft, but a little chapped from their journey. It was warm though. That heat seemed to fill Gale to his bones. He’d forgotten what it was like being with a mortal after so much time with an immortal. Mystra always seemed happy with their coupling. Open and willing to reciprocate, but it was always incorporeal for them. Gale had made offers to pleasure her in other ways. Use what skills he had to please his goddess, but she always declined. As if unwilling to let her once mortal body turn divine be touched in any way resembling a human. At the time Gale had been contented with that. But with the clarity that distance and perspective could now offer, he could now see the benefits of both.

Gale gasped into their kiss as he felt Tav’s fingers brush over the front of his tunic. Down from his chest to his belly. The muscles twitch even with the slightest touch. He had forgotten about that too. Touch.

He moved from kissing Tav’s lips down to her neck. Her breath hitched as her pulse hammered against his lips. Feeling her life’s drum just there against her skin. Gale could understand why Astarion was so tempted now. As he kissed her neck and collarbone, his fingers danced over her body. Gale may not have magic in his fingers when it came to locks, but he was certainly dexterous enough to be able to do lacings & the like. Their garments melting away as if by actual magic.

Gale took a moment to push up on his hands and get a full look at Tav. She was beautiful. Radiant. The light on her skin. The pert of her breasts in the night air. The imperfections of scars, freckles, and spots here & there all perfect. The perfection of realism.

The wizard swooped back down to finish kissing Tav all the way down. Moving to her sternum. Toying with her breasts. The weight of them soft but noticeable as he worked them in his hand. He moaned in tandem with Tav as her fingers brushed into his hair as he suckled at her breast. Feeling her there, reciprocating, listening to her enjoy what he was doing to her, Gale thought he might burst. He was so hard, and the bedding he had conjured provided little relief to the pressure as he rubbed against it.

Gale continued his path down. Kissing over Tav’s stomach until he came to the apex between her thighs. “Can you open a little more for me, my love?” He was hesitant to use the term of endearment. Fearful that he might have pushed too far. Perhaps they were not ready for pet names. But when he saw Tav part for him with a shy little smile, he decided he would call her that every day.

Her scent flowed up to him as her legs parted. Sweet yet sensual. Gale felt his mouth literally water in reflex. How long had it been since he tasted a woman fully? How longer still had it been since he’d done this with a woman that he loved?

Even with the lapse in time, it was like a fish to water for Gale. Based on Tav’s moans & shutters he had not forgotten how to please with his verbose, practiced tongue. He swiped up through her center, teasing the nub at the cleft, before sliding back down to collect her sweet honey. His hands massaged her thighs which were warm and lax by his ears. Gods. How had he gone so long without this in his life? He felt like a starving man sat down in front of his first meal.

Gale moaned into her cunt as he felt Tav reach for him between her legs. Fingers in his hair. Gripping and pulling in pleasure. His cock was already rock hard but it jutted in excitement with every tightening of her fingers. He made quick work to finish lest he truly embarrass himself on their first rendezvous.

Tav cried out as she came. Her thighs tightening in his hand. She looked beautiful lying there all spent. The slightest hint of perspiration on her skin illuminated in the moonlight. Gale had seen gods, but he could think of no sight finer.

He crawled over Tav again until they were nose to nose. “Are you sure?” He wanted to ask again. Maybe she had changed her mind? Maybe this was enough for him to hope for?

Tav just wrapped her arms around his neck and braced her knees against his side. “Do it.”

The commanding voice sent a shiver down Gale’s spine. Enough to make him almost cum right there. He restrained himself and reached down to moisten his cock with spittle and pre-cum. Then he lined up with Tav’s entrance and pushed forward.

The two of them moaned. Gale did not expect how hot inside her would be, how tight. With Mystra everything was so open and vast. The vastness of eternity and the Weave open to them to express their feelings. Here, with Tav, everything seemed to file down to a single point. A single moment. Just the two of them in the whole wide world. Gale moved his hips back and pressed forward again. Starting a slow, easy rhythm. He wanted this moment to last forever; or at least as long as possible.

Tav held on to him and moved her hips back to meet him. The perfect partnership, just like their adventure. Gale leaned down to kiss her and was met with equal passion. Tongues melding, gasping breaths, hearts racing. Everywhere Tav touched him seemed to leave a burning trail across his body, waiting to consume him. Had it always been like this with mortals and he had just forgotten? No. Gale knew he would remember this if it had happened. It had to be Tav.

His hips sped up and Tav rose to meet him with glee. He could feel that he was going to climax soon, and it became his single focus for the next few moments before stumbled in his thrust with a low, powerful moan. White hot flashes across his eyes as he was sure was spilling inside her.

Gale broke from a final kiss with Tav in their coupling and rested his head against hers. He felt tired, but indeed sated as he anticipated he would be. Complete. Should the world and the orb come to swallow him whole, Gale would be able to do it with but one regret now on his mind. That he couldn’t be with her longer.

The wizard carefully dislodged himself from Tav and pulled her close with the conjured blanket to wrap them in. “We’ll need to head back before morning.” He reasoned. The others would come looking for them, and his spell of stars would not last forever. But it would for a little while longer. For now, he just wanted to spend the remainder of the night with Tav in his arms. As a man. As two lovers. Not a wizard and adventure on a path to save the world. Just him and Tav.

[aerynwrites]

Unexpected, But Not Unwelcome

Gale Dekarios x afab!Reader/Tav

A/N: based on this request - god I literally wrote this the second that I got it lol. Gale was the perfect one to write this request for imo and it was such a pleasure!

Word Count: 1.8k

Warnings: pregnant reader, slight angst, pregnancy, fluff.

The longer you’ve lived in Waterdeep the more you start to understand why the balcony outside the study is Gales' chosen spot in his tower. 

You still remember the slight shock you felt when you first arrived to see the space was exactly like the illusion he showed you all those months ago. 

Now it’s also become your place of solace, much to the wizards delight. 

“Views like this are much better enjoyed with company. And I couldn’t wish for a better half to spend it with.” 

The balcony is swathed in deep orange light, the sun slowly creeping towards the horizon, the bottom just barely kissing the edge of sea way out in the distance. Her fading rays dance along the calm bay waters, the only disturbance to its surface being the few ships leaving or entering port. 

‘What do they carry?’ you wonder. 

Fine silks and clothing? Or perhaps rare spices from across the world. It’s a game you find yourself playing more often than not whenever you sit out here. But now…

Now it’s all you can do to try and focus on the ships, your mind constantly flitting back to the news you were given earlier in the day. 

You’d missed your monthly cycle a few weeks back, and while it wasn’t immediately alarming, that along with other symptoms finally made you decided to seek out a healer. 

Gale had told you of his plans to spend the day at Sorcerers Sundries, looking for a specific tome for research he was working on. So, today was the perfect day to slip away unnoticed. You didn’t want to worry your husband unnecessarily, but now you want nothing more than for him to be home, the news eating away at you. 

You’re pregnant. 

It’s honestly nothing you’ve ever truly thought about. Before the tadpoles, you’d been alone, just living day to day in Baldur’s Gate. Then of course the whole tadpole incident happened and then…you met Gale and fell in love and started to build a life with him here, in Waterdeep. 

You’re honestly surprised the topic never came up. But now, with it staring you in the face…a sense of uncertainty settles deep in your belly. 

Tara noticed immediately of course, aware of your unusual quietness as you retreated to the balcony as soon as you got home. You’d found yourself spilling the news to the intelligent cat as soon as she asked, her deep eyes softening ever so slightly as she jumped in your lap and curled up. 

You couldn’t help but sense a wave of excitement coming from her, though. A sense that somewhat calmed you despite the nerves running wild in your mind. 

That was a few hours ago, Tara hasn’t moved from her spot, lounging peacefully as you stroked her fur and watch the ships glide across the water. 

Only the very distant sound of the tower door opening and closing, and Gales faint greeting finally pulls you from your thoughts, that anxiety creeping back in full force as you tense. 

Tara sits up as well, stretching and letting out an enviable yawn. You wish you could be that relaxed. 

“Relax, dear,” Tara says gently, nuzzling your hand before turning to jump from your lap. “I feel you have nothing to be worried about.” 

She turned and pads towards the inside of the tower just as Gale appears in the archway, stopping to offer her a welcoming scratch before she disappears.

He sends you a warm smile as he rights himself, approaching and taking a seat next to you on the padded bench, arm wrapping around your waist instinctively as he presses a kiss to your temple.

“How was your day, my love?” He asks, nose nuzzling your cheek. 

You smile, realizing it doesn’t quite reach your eyes past the anxiety roiling in your chest. “It was good,” you tell him, not completely lying but not offering the full truth either. “How was your adventure to Sorcerer’s Sundries?” 

At the mention of the bookstore Gale’s eyes light up as he tells you about what he found. Slowly, as he talks about the new information he found regarding his research, you both maneuver into a more comfortable position. Gale moves to lay across the length of the padded bench, leaning against the armrest as you settle between his legs, back resting against his chest. 

His arms wrap loosely around your middle, hands resting over your stomach, completely unaware of the life that’s now growing there. 

His words fade into the background as your mind starts to wander again, your hands moving to rest atop his own, your fingers slipping to toy with the simple gold band around his ring finger.

You don’t truly have many worries about the news. You know that Gale will weather anything with you but…you don’t want this to be a storm, or anything negative. What if Gale doesn’t want children? What if he pulls away from you when you tell him the news or is just as scared as you feel?

Soft lips against your neck pull you from your thoughts, familiar fingers slipping between your own to give them a squeeze. 

“I know my research ramblings can at times be boresome. However, you seem to be lost to me more than usual this evening.” His words are gentle with just a touch of amusement as rests his head against yours. “What’s on your mind?”

You don’t respond right away, your nerves at an all time high and making your already tumultuous stomach even more uneasy. You squeeze his hand in yours.

“I went to see a healer today.”

Gale’s arms tighten around you, and you can feel the way he sits up straighter, your words concerning him. 

“A healer? I didn’t even notice - are you sick?” He asks, worry clear in his voice. “I cannot believe I was so preoccupied I failed to take note of-“

You tug on the sleeve of his robes, holding him tighter to you. “I’m not sick. At least not…” You trail off, taking your lip between your teeth.

Gale urges you on with a gentle press of his lips to your shoulder, and that action alone seems to calm the raging sea of anxiety within you. 

“I’m with child, Gale.” 

The silence that follows your revelation feels oppressive. The only sounds meeting your ears being the lapping of waves against the shore and the distant call of gulls in the air. 

Emotion clogs your throat as you clutch his hand. “Please…say something.”

You sit up then, turning to face the man behind you, but before you can fully do so, two strong arms wrap around you and bring you to your feet. Your surroundings turn into a blur around you as Gale spins you through the air, boisterous laughter falling from his lips until he brings you to a stop, capturing you in a breathtaking kiss. 

His lips are warm and his arms secure as he holds you to him, as if afraid this would all fade away if he were to let you go. 

Heat floods your cheeks when he pulls away, elation adorning his features as he looks at you, eyes glowing with an utter joy you’ve never quite seen on him before. He cradles your face in his hands, thumbs brushing softly against your cheeks. 

“I’m going to be a father? We’re going to have a child?” He asks, whispering the words in unbelieving reverence. 

The smile that splits your lips is almost painful, any and all anxiety dissipating from you as you take in his reaction. 

“Yes they…The healer said I would start showing soon, and if we want…Towards the end of the pregnancy they should be able to tell us the gender,” you tell him, hands grasping at the fabric of his robe. 

Gale smiles wider, hands falling down to cradle your stomach and the new life that sits there. 

“It doesn’t matter,” he says gently. “They will be loved either way, and no doubt a powerful wielder of the weave if I have anything to say about it.”

You can’t stop the chuckle that slips past your lips, and the surprising happy tears that fall down your cheeks. Gale notices the streaks immediately, smile faltering ever so slightly as he reaches back up to wipe the tears away.

“Why the tears? This is a joyous occasion, we should be celebrating!” 

You shake your head, reaching up to place your hand atop his own as you turn to press a kiss to his palm. “They aren’t tears of grief…I was worried. Worried about telling you. I didn’t…we’ve never talked about children.”

Your husband smiles gently, eyes reassuring as he leans in to press a kiss to the corner of your lips. “I can admit that this news was unexpected, but it’s…it is not unwelcome,” he tells you, eyes bright once more. “I’ve never given much thought to children because of everything that had consumed my mind in the past and then you appeared in my life and took over the rest of my thoughts,” he laughs. “But this…” He presses his hands to your belly again. “This is more than I could have ever asked for. More than any power I’ve ever dreamed of having. I find myself filled with indescribable joy at the thought of creating a life with you - a family.”

You press your lips to his as soon as the words leave his lips, pulling him impossibly closer until you break away to nuzzle into the space between his head and shoulder, excitement and happiness threatening to burst from your chest. 

“I love you, Gale Dekarios.” You say, smiling as he pulls you tighter against him. “I can’t wait to start a family with you.”

You move to speak, but the presence of a familiar winged feline interrupts you as Tara rushes onto the balcony, wiggling happily. 

“Oh my!” She exclaims, weaving between yours and Gale’s legs before jumping effortlessly up to perch on his shoulder as you both separate. “This is most exciting! Another Dekarios, can you believe it?” She asks, turning to Gale. “Hopefully this one won’t light himself on fire like you did all those years ago.”

You watch in amusement as Gale flushes a light shade of pink, flicking Tara’s ear playfully. “I was just starting to learn to master the weave! And I was eight, you can hardly blame me.”

You chuckle at their antics and reach up to card your hands through his hair at the nape of his neck, drawing his attention back to you.

“Well, they will have the best teacher. There’s no telling what they will accomplish with you as their guide.”

Gale smiles, leaning down to kiss you one last time before embracing you once more. 

“We’ll guide them together.”

You hum in agreement, basking in the golden rays of the setting sun, the snapping of sails echoing across the water as you whisper against his skin. 

“Together.”

Tags:

@dark-and-kawaii

[lakefu]

A Perfect Warmth 🕯️

Summary: Astarion and Tav take a well deserved break away form the chaos of their adventures at an inn inside Baldur's Gate. They need to clean up and get back on the road but they keep getting distracted. Perhaps plans could be delayed for a night of passion...

Pairing: Astarion x female!Tav

Tags: 18+, Explicit, fluffy smut, brief Astarion trauma response, PIV, erogenous elf ears, scent kink, blood + biting, a bit of praise, a bit of edging... a sprinkle of cockwarming...., these guys are in love...

Word count: 3.5k Note: This was my first fic originally uploaded on Ao3 on 11/27/23, inspired by the patch #4 dev note mentioning adding sponges to clean your companions. I've made edits from the Ao3 post.

“Remind me to sell this junk next time we pass by a merchant, would you dear?” Astarion was seated at the edge of the bed and rummaging through his traveler’s pack, placing various items on the nightstand for further examination. Two silver forks, an old necklace, and a handful of various polished stones ended up on the table before he plucked out an intricate sapphire ring and held it up to the sunlight peeking through the window.

“Good taste,” he muttered to himself. He placed the ring on his pinky finger in amusement and resumed the scavenge. 

“It’s going to get difficult sneaking up on people if I have to lug this heavy thing around you know.” He threw over a glance at Tav, who was preoccupied with gathering laundry together in preparation for the next day.

“It wouldn’t be so heavy if you didn’t pocket nearly every shiny thing we came across,” she teased, without even looking over at him.

He gasped dramatically. “Framed by my own lover? Quite the scandal. Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten the near dozen times you’ve asked me to hold onto your things because your own pack was too full.”

“Hmm. Maybe. I guess that might sound sort of familiar…” She giggled to herself and walked into the bedroom to catch his eye, meeting him with a mischievous grin. 

“Why are you such a- oh! Now, what’s this you’re wearing?” Astarion blinked and scanned her up and down, clearly enthralled by the wardrobe change. She stood there in an old linen robe that was yellowed with age, definitely unlike anything he had ever seen her in before.

“Just some old thing I found in the dresser here, isn’t it just fabulous?” Tav's words were dripping in sarcasm and yet she smiled, performing a grandiose little spin in the middle of the room as if she was wearing the most beautiful ball gown in the world.

“I… it’s just so different from your usual armor or that drow nightwear you fancy so much. You look so… domestic.” His eyes were locked onto Tav intensely, with brow furrowed as he seemed to be confused by his own words.

She felt her heart skip a beat and a flush run to her face.

“And you think that’s a good look for me?”

His eyes softened and he paused a moment before quietly answering.

“Yes… I do.”

Tav watched as his smile faded and the gaze of his eyes became increasingly more distant. The atmosphere seemed to shift and a slight panic ran through her body. Did she do something wrong? No... and it didn’t require a tadpole connection to get an understanding for what had brought down his spirits.

Astarion hadn’t considered a comfortable domestic life was possible for someone like him. Even the slightest concept of such a thing had been buried for over a hundred years, and he never expected it to resurface. Was he worthy of such a thing, and was it even possible? 

Oh, it was possible. The evidence was standing right in front of him, spinning circles in an ugly bathrobe. He could see glimpses of a happy future that was so close to being a reality he nearly felt nauseous. Not because he was unsure of himself, but because there were still too many unresolved matters they had a duty to attend to. Too many missions and stupid little quests that could now go wrong and threaten this idea of a happy ending he never even knew was possible.

Everything was different now that he realized what was possible, and he suddenly felt an unknown and uncomfortable pressure. All he knew was that he couldn’t afford to lose in the upcoming battles. Battles that some would say were impossible, suicidal even. The thought of loss at this point was beyond unbearable. It was sickening just to think about.

“Hey!!” Tav ran up to where he was sitting on the bed and took his head in her hands. She placed a delicate kiss on his forehead, knowing she had to get him focused on something else.

“Why don’t we go to the shop right now and get rid of that stuff,” she motioned to the collection of items that had been gathered on the nightstand.

“Wouldn’t hurt to get some more coin in our pockets, right?” She looked at him expectantly and felt a huge relief as a light seemed to return to his eye and meet her view.

“Please tell me you aren’t going to wear that horrid robe to see the merchant,” he sighed and looked up at her pleadingly.

“Of course not!! I’ll change and- oh gods!!! We’ve got to get this blood off your face, the merchant is going to think we are trying to kill him!” Tav exclaimed as she lightly shook his shoulders, and quickly began examining his body to see how much cleaning would have to get done before they could leave.

“Blood… on my face?” He raised an eyebrow and brought a finger to his cheek.

“Yeah!! Well, it’s all over you really, dontcha remember earlier today, fighting those cultists?? You sneaked up behind one of ‘em and BAM!!! Just obliterated with a single strike, it was amazing!! You’re so strong…you know.” Her pulse was racing at the mere memory of the event as she delicately traced the side of his face with her fingers and ventured down to his chest. 

“Ah of course. That was all so terribly easy I’d nearly forgotten,” he said proudly, adjusting his posture and keeping his eyes on Tav’s hand movements sliding across his chest. Her soft touch was becoming more firm as her fingers made their way toward his arms, giving his biceps a teasing squeeze before leaning her face into his and teasing a kiss.

Before their lips could touch, Astarion wags a finger in between their faces as if to remind Tav of the task at hand.

“Alright my sweet, let’s clean up shall we? You’re my mirror after all. So, go on then.” He took her hands into his own and gave them a kiss before placing them back at her side, encouraging her to go and gather whatever it was she needed to get him cleaned up.

Right, the supplies. It was nearly impossible to remain focused after moments of intimacy with him, no matter how brief they were. She quickly moved into the other room to acquire the washcloths and bucket of soapy water that she was using for herself not too long ago. Hands full, she scurried back to the bedroom to meet her lover, who hadn’t moved an inch.

As she approached him, Tav could feel the tie on her robe becoming increasingly more loose with each step that was taken across the floor. The embarrassment hit her as she realized she didn't have any hands free to do anything about it. She quickly tried to put the bucket down by the bedside, but the bending movement only resulted in the robe slipping off one of her shoulders, exposing a bare breast.

“Oh? You haven’t got anything on underneath?” Astarion cocked his head in amusement, eyes unmoving from the newly exposed skin.

“Ye-yeah that’s the whole point of robes isn’t it? I was doing laundry earlier ya know and umm,” She laughed nervously and started to fix the wardrobe malfunction but was quickly stopped by a hand over her own. Astarion reached out toward her until both hands were around her waist and pulled her in close to his body. Fangs were peeking through his devious smile while determined eyes looked her up and down. With a singular finger he crept over to the loose knot of the robe’s tie and flicked it completely undone with one swift movement.

Tav shuddered and felt her body starting to run warm despite now being suddenly exposed to the cool air of the inn. She was completely revealed to him now, the robe only just clinging to her arms and draped across her backside.

“Gods, you’re beautiful,” he sighed and began kissing her stomach and caressing the curves of her waist. “Come here.”

Tav gasped as she felt his cold grip around her waist tighten as he expertly lifted her up onto his lap with ease. Pleased at the new angle, Astarion shifted his attention to kissing the crook of her neck and started moving down her chest. He delightfully found her nipple with his mouth in no time, and teased it in circles with his tongue just as he knew she liked it. His gentle sucking continued for only a few brief moments before he suddenly withdrew and cleared his throat.

“Ah, well. You can reach my face better up here I’m sure. For the cleaning of course,” he said smugly. The elf leaned back and admired the view of his lover, nude and flustered, perched oh-so perfectly on top of him.

“The cleaning…” Tav nodded and remembered she still had a warm and soapy washcloth in her hand. The urge to throw the stupid cloth into some unknown corner of the room was nearly undeniable. All she wanted in this moment was for him to take her completely, in any way he wanted, it didn’t matter as long as she ended up getting fucked into oblivion. So fine. On with the cleaning.

She raised the washcloth to his temple and slowly began to wipe away the dried blood by working down his face. His cheeks were a bit sunken as usual but flushed adorably in this moment, clearly enjoying the tender rubs of cloth on his skin. She continued rubbing down toward his chiseled jawline, across to his lips, and back up the other side to repeat the process once more. She ran her fingers through his silver curls and noticed his ears would need cleaning too. 

One hand caressed the pointy ear to keep it in place and the other brought the washcloth in for a gentle scrub. A quiet moan suddenly escaped the vampire’s lips.

Oh? She had seemingly discovered a sensitive spot and noted that she would have to continue her work carefully. The scrubbing continued but Tav couldn’t keep her eyes off his face now. His eyes were closed but still noticeably moving behind their lids, and his lips were slightly parted with his breathing becoming increasingly heavier and more noticeable. 

Astarion was in his own world of pleasure. What in the hells had he been doing these past weeks, aimlessly scrubbing himself clean alone in the river when they could have been doing this the whole time instead?

He opened his eyes just to make sure it wasn’t all a dream. She was still there of course, diligently and lovingly taking such good care of his body. A wave of maddening lust rushed through his core and he needed her closer. He needed her as close as physically possible and even more so after that.

Their eyes met, revealing intense desires. Tav lowered her hands and she spoke slowly, “Can you take your shirt off? There’s a spot I can’t get to with it on…” 

She wasn’t fooling anybody, but he obeyed without hesitation. The shirt was gone in seconds, revealing his pale and perfectly sculpted chest. It was a sight that Tav never tired of admiring, and was in fact the subject of distracting daydreams on the daily. She shifted her body closer to his and continued scrubbing his neck and chest, despite it becoming increasingly more difficult to focus. Deep breaths.

She had always been fond of his cologne that he was quite proud of concocting himself. The scent of aged brandy, bergamot, and rosemary was now forever an Astarion specialty that she could never forget. Even during times of battle or travel, a gust of wind could carry his essence to her and bring along with it a sense of reassuring familiarity. As she continued to wipe him down, however, a different scent began to come to the forefront.

It was something that did not seem completely foreign, but it wasn't immediately identifiable either. There was something about taking it all in that felt forbidden. Tav tried to pinpoint what she was experiencing. He smelled earthy… raw… unnatural… it was without a doubt, the undeath.

An undeniable heat rose through her body as she engulfed herself with this pure scent from her lover. The washcloth, the bed, the entire room seemed miles away, and nothing felt coherent except for a craving to be even closer to him. Nothing else existed except their bodies and her overwhelming desire to-

“Eager, are we?” A sultry voice snapped her back into reality, where piercing red eyes amusingly greeted her return. She suddenly became aware of a presence between her thighs and glanced down, realizing she was sitting atop a clothed bulge. His hands had a firm grip on her backside and his encouraging movements made it clear she had been absentmindedly grinding on him during her trance. 

“Shit, I got carried away…” She hadn’t taken her eyes off his crotch and began to notice that her excitement had left a dampness on his clothes. Embarrassment nearly overtook her, but a gentle yet confident hand grabbed her chin and brought it up to meet his gaze. He leaned into her with a grinning open mouth and kissed her passionately, tongues intertwining.

She felt his fangs briefly scrape against her tongue every so often until a metallic taste became increasingly noticeable. She didn't mind the blood, especially since it seemed to enhance his arousal as noted by his hips continuously jolting faster up into her exposed crotch. Tav was soon pleasantly overwhelmed between his deep kisses and desperate hands groping her at every curve of her body. She longed to give him everything; her blood for his hunger, her body for his pleasure. 

Tav released herself from the kiss they had been locked into and tilted her head so that her neck became exposed as an undeniable gift. His mouth lunged at the presented spot as soon as it was noticed, fangs immediately sinking in deep. Tav cried out at the initial impact but soon was reveling in the experience. It was a perfect mixture of pain and pleasure that she was only capable of experiencing from him.

He remained on her neck for a while, still tightly holding on to her body and keeping one hand free to reassuringly caress the back of her head. It was only after the blood flow slowed to a near stop did he cease his medley of licking and sucking at the wound. Blood dripped down his chin and onto his exposed chest, but he was ultimately unfazed. He leaned back, clearly happy and mostly satisfied, but there was still a different type of satisfaction he had left to chase.

Astarion's throbbing erection was begging to be released from its clothed restraints. He quickly untied his pants and shifted his underwear to finally free it. He moaned a few incomprehensible words of relief and stroked himself a few times before looking up at Tav for approval.

Tav had been staring at his length from the moment it was exposed, an impressive size for an elf, no doubt. Her eyes fixated on his perfectly pink tip, glistening with precum just for her. She immediately fantasized of shoving him down her throat until she choked and cried, but that was a fantasy for another day. In their current position, they both knew there was only one simple way of how to continue.

“Astarion,” she whimpered. “Fuck me.”

Tav sat up on her knees and positioned herself so that her entrance was just nearly grazing the head of his dick, ready to take him in completely at any moment. She grabbed ahold of his shaft and guided the tip back and forth through her folds until he was covered in her slick. The new sensation of the friction between them left them both gasping and desperate for more.

Suddenly, finally, his arms wrapped around her body as he pulled her down onto him with one firm motion. Astarion grunted through his teeth while Tav moaned unapologetically, focusing on relaxing enough to allow her body to adjust to his length inside of her. 

The temperature differences between their bodies only heightened the feelings of pleasure whenever they became one. Her warmness was intoxicating to him, granting a sense of safety and bliss that was impossible to achieve anywhere else. He was already so close to the edge in this moment, but was not ready to give in just yet. He wanted this moment of heaven to last as long as possible.

Meanwhile, Tav was having the time of her life riding her man like there was no tomorrow. She had no intent to slow down until a pair of large hands suddenly gripped her hips in a way that prevented any further movement.

“I’m not done with you yet, love. Didn’t you notice the mess I’ve made after feasting on you?” Astarion took a finger to his chin and smeared a bit of Tav’s fresh blood down his neck.

It was true, he had made a mess. Quite uncharacteristically of him in fact. Tav had assumed he had simply gotten careless in his horny and feral craze but no- it was clearly all calculated. 

“Just be still and sit nice and pretty on my cock. Finish the cleaning, then I’ll take care of you myself. How does that sound?” 

How does that sound? His words echoed in her head, which was already spinning plenty enough as it was. She was unsure if it was from the blood loss or her seemingly never ending carnal desires, but perhaps it was both. One thing was certain, however, he could convince her to do damn near anything speaking in that low and lustful tone of his. Without uttering a word she slowly brought the washcloth up to his chest. 

“Good girl,” he whispered. He felt her body twitch around him in response to the praise, and he leaned back to relax and enjoy these final few moments of intimacy. 

It had taken everything in Tav's power to remain still while she worked. It wasn't exactly easy to focus- she was being split in half by a whimpering vampire beneath her after all. Astarion’s skilled fingers had been dancing around her swollen clit the whole time, just enough to keep her stimulated but never enough to let her come.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the blood was all cleaned up. She hadn't even realized when it happened or how he did it, but his pants were completely gone now. She reached over to place the cloth down and awaited her reward of sweet release.

Astarion’s hands moved to the knees that were straddling him and slowly pushed them farther apart, spreading Tav’s legs open bit by bit. She inhaled sharply as she took him in deeper. He opened her up more and more until she lost her balance and fell backwards onto his expectant embrace. 

“Relax darling, I’ve got you,” He purred in reassurance. 

Astarion took her entire weight in his arms with ease and laid her down amongst the soft pillows of the bed. He nestled himself comfortably between her legs, making sure their bodies were flush with one another. Nearly smothered by his body now, all Tav could do was claw at his back and arch her hips into his powerful thrusts. His mouth frantically traveled across her lips and neck with desperately wet kisses until he settled near her ear with a playful nibble.

“You’re so beautiful…” He whispered tenderly, while the rhythm of his lovemaking became increasingly sporadic. “So fucking perfect… Gods…just for me… I love you… so much...”

“Star, I- ah!” Her words cut short as she felt something snap within her. Pure ecstasy- she was falling and flying somewhere a million galaxies away and never wanted to come back. Obscene noises and curses filled the room as they rode out each other’s high in tight embrace. The smell of sex lingered in the air as their bodies heaved with labored breaths, finally collapsing on each other in exhaustion. 

They laid together a while longer, exchanging soft kisses and enjoying the short moment in time where nothing else in the world mattered. Eventually, Astarion rolled out of the bed and stood up to stretch. 

“Tsk, looks like it’s my turn to clean you up my dear,” He said with an accomplished grin, eying how her thighs were dripping with his sticky mess.

“I’ll be right back, don’t move an inch. Actually, I doubt you can move at all after that, ahaha!” He laughed and leaned over to brush aside a strand of Tav’s sweaty hair that was stuck to her forehead before walking over to the other room. 

“Shut up… dummy…” she smiled to herself and rolled over, feeling at ease enough that the weight of sleep was starting to overtake her.

“I love you too, Astarion.” Her eyes closed as she drifted off into a peaceful slumber, knowing that her lover would soon come back to her side like he always did, and always would.

[wolfish-trickster]

Red eyes seeing green

Astarion x f!reader/Tav

Word count: 3.8K

Summary: A long time ago you've told Astarion what your ideal type is, which is an exact opposite of him. Since then he has won your heart and accidentally you've won his. All would be well if it wasn't for Halsin, a literal embodiment of all physical traits you like on men, joining your group.

Warnings: angst if you squint, pure fluff

A/N: i know the devs confirmed he's fine with you (tav) and Halsin but i really wanted to see him jealous. Also the plot may be all over the place since I took a break from it and finished it like three weeks later😅

Astarion POV

It's been couple of weeks since Astarion's been infected with a tadpole. A nuisance really, until he felt sun rays on his face for the first time in centuries. Only then did he see it as a blessing in disguise. Even more so after he has met you and you've recruited him into your little "fellowship".

In the begining he couldn't care less about anyone. They either distrussted him (understandably after threateing one of them with a dagger on their first meeting), ignored him or down right hated him. It took a while for them to simple be 'meh' about him, a welcome change. Afterwards he started observing everyone, looking for the leader. Karlach was his first guess. Strong, ferocious, not to mention the contrast with her personality. His second guess was Gale. Only because he overheard him mention how a certain event happened before Karlach joined. He seemed to be in the group the longest. His guess was only logical.

But not in a million years would he guess you as a leader. Kind, loving, certainly weak looking. If you told him birds braid your hair every morning he wouldn't even question you. And yet you were the head of this little group of weirdos.

Plan was simple. Seduce you. Make your heart beat only for him. Secure a safe existence by your love-blind self. Profit.

Well, almost.

Despite your sweet and almost innocent personality he had a hard time seducing you. It was fine, Astarion liked a good challenge and he has had harder nuts to crack before.

"You can recite flirty lines all night Astarion, none of them will work," you giggled.

"Oh really," he smirked. "How can you be so sure when I haven't even used my best lines yet?"

"It's not about what you say, but how you look like," you smiled sweetly at him, almost mocking him. "You may not have a physical type but most people still do."

Ah, an appearance. One of his weaknesses. He knew his eyes were red, and when his hair grew long enough to see he could observe snowy white locks. His face must've been attractive as well. Based on how successful he was when fulfilling Cazador's orders. Same could be said about his toned body.

"Are you suggesting my dashing self isn't to your taste?" He said half teasingly with his usual bravado. How could anyone look at him and turn him down?

"Exactly," you answered.

Oh. That's how.

"I mean, don't get me wrong, you look good, but," you looked to the side, a slight blush covering your pointy ears.

"If only you had dark hair, long enough to braid. I always loved men with long luscious hair. Bonus points if they style it half up half down. There's just something about that hairstyle," you bit your lower lip.

"But they had to be clean shaved. My friends used to tease me for being a hypocrite," you giggled, lost in memories of your youth. "I just don't want to feel like i'm kissing a hedgehog, you know? And scars," you sighed dreamily, "I once knew this one stable boy when I was just entering my teenagehood. He had this huge scar across his nose and cheek. From a stalion that kicked him. He looked so good," you almost moaned when memories of your first ever crush rushed through your mind.

Astarion listened to your ramblings and for some reason started to feel... uneasy? Anxious? Hard to name a feeling he hasn't felt in a long time. Could it be because he doesn't fit any of your 'requirements'? Or could it be because a certain wizard fit your describtion almost to a t? But Astarion relaxed, Gale would never shave that dead squirrel on his face.

He forced out a high pitched laugh. "Good luck finding anyone that fits all your describtions darling. I pity you though. Being this picky robs you of lots of fun."

You shrugged. "Maybe. Or maybe," you stepped towards him, making his undead heart beat a bit faster, to his surprise. "Maybe I'll have way more fun with my dark-haired, half-updo having, clean-shaven, scar-faced future lover than with a horny vampire," you booped his nose and walked away, leaving him stunned.

How in the world will he ever fulfill his plan?

Turns out he didn't need to. For the first time in his life his body was totally useless to his plans. All he had to do to win your heart was couple of deep moments here, some nice deeds there, a cliche rose he saw you stare at a bit too long. Very romantic. Very normal. Very...innocent. And very time consuming as well.

But he couldn't say he minded. Quite the opposite, he enjoyed all the little moments he experienced with you. When you were by his side, talking about absolute nonsense under the starry night while the dying bonfire cracked and all your companions slept in their tents, in moments like that he felt normal again. Alive. He forgot about all he's been through in the past two centuries. For a short while, true, but even that was better than a blessing from any god, if any of them existed.

After another night like that he came to a realization: he loved you. Sincerely.

Which wasn't part of the plan. At all. Maybe it'll pass? Yeah. It will definitelly pass. He has concidered some of his past victims almost charming, but the feeling went away by the time they passed Cazador's palace gates. In this case it will take a day, maybe two.

A whole week passed and his heart only continued beating for you. He couldn't take it anymore. Lying was fun, but not to you. Not anymore.

He came clean. About everything. His manipulation, failed seduction. Everything. It happened on a type of night he has selfishly claimed as only his and yours. Fire cracked, companions slept, stars twinkled and you, just like always, stunned him by hugging him and confessing to him.

He hasn't stopped shoving your love for him in everyone's faces since, especially Gale's. He hasn't gotten to enjoying your body either, but he didn't really mind. You stayed with him despite his trauma, and that was enough for him. Besides, he doesn't want to mentally escape while making love to the only person who unconditionally cared for him. He wanted to be fully present, you deserved it. Who cares if his healing will take a month or a year, or several? You certainly didn't. You were just happy to be with him, and so was he.

His brand new plan of building his life with you, with a side quest of killing a certain bastard, fell apart when you met a druid.

Halsin.

Astarion didn't mind him at first. Even became somewhat fond of him. Until he started noticing the little things. Halsin's lingering looks. Your kind smile. The two of you fighting side by side more often then you fought by Astarion's side.

And then the memory of his first seduction fail came back. Your type. Long dark hair. Half updo. Shaved. Scarred. Halsin ticked every single box. Astarion mentally slapped himself. How could he even begin to think any of this would last? Everything was too good to be true, too dreamy to be exact. Like straight out of one of Wyll's stories.

It became clear to him. Halsin will want to bed you. And you would, understandably, accept. It was just a matter of days till you walk up to him and tell him about Halsin's great proposition. If you'd be generous enough to tell him beforehand, that is. If you were secretely rotten just like the rest of the world you'd tell him only after, either to boast or to rub salt in his wounds. Indirectly telling him you have needs he cannot fulfill.

He really hoped you wouldn't do the latter. Hells, he hoped you'd refuse Halsin altogether and stay loyal to what the two of you have. But what exactly is that? Just two people who cuddle a lot and kiss. A relationship no different from that formed by children.

Yeah. In the end he wouldn't blame you. He really wouldn't. The only thing he wishes for is your heart belonging to him, your love only being reserved for him. If sleeping with Halsin is what it takes for you to stay his than so be it. He's survived worse.

Days came and went. You still cuddled with him through every night. Astarion even started to have hopes he was making all of that up. He would never be happier to be wrong.

Until one day...

"Astarion," came your voice sweeter than honey. "You would not believe the conversation I just had with Halsin."

He laughed. Bitterly. "I was wondering when you were going to ask me about this," his voice was aloof, almost sort of cheerful. Disguising his disapointment. Not in you of course, in life itself.

"Did he talk to you about it?" You asked, a bit surprised.

"I guessed. The man can't stay quiet about 'enjoying the freedom of nature's gifts', ha," he mocked Halsin's deep voice. "He would outlaw clothing if he could."

"Aaaand what do you say?" You looked up at him with your bright eyes he loved getting lost in so much.

He gulped down a bitter set of words and put on his practiced smile. "I don't mind at all. Go on, have fun. As long as you return to me in the end."

He watched. Waited for your reaction. A happy squeel, a set of thank yous, a relief, an excitement your urges will be met after such a long time, anything really. But he didn't expect your smile to fall, your eyes darken with something. Anger? No, anger looks different on you. Disapointment? More likely, but not quite that either.

"Are you serious?" You asked, tone cold.

Your POV

You were never desired. Not by your peers, your crushes, random people, nobody. Not that you were ugly, you just blended into the background easily. Sure, after people got to know you they became rather fond, but it always took time. Very few people have that nowadays. If the cover doesn't interest them they won't even bother to read the book.

Then came the disaster, the mindflayers, the tadpole. It would be the most miserable time of your life, if you haven't met your companions. One by one they've made your dull life a bit lighter, livelier.

Especially Astarion. His appearance didn't interest you in the begining. Pale as a chalk, curly hair growing barely past his ears. He had no facial hair whatsoever which could be his saving feature but he was robbed of the hotness a scar could bring him.

However your feelings changed when you started talking with him, getting to know him. He had so much more to himself and his appearance became something that was just there and not the first thing you noticed every time you looked at him.

Funny enough, you've started to notice a slight change in his behaviour towards you. Touches lingered a bit too long, smile became a bit less perfect. And something in his eyes you couldn't really put a finger on.

He confessed to you one night. Not a confession you'd be thrilled to hear. He told you about his plan, his manipulation. It made your heart crack. Of course this would happen. Of course someone would be interested in you only if they could gain something from you. Were you cursed?

You wanted to be mad. You wanted to slap him and tell him to go to hells. But you couldn't. Not after the words that followed next.

He loved you. Even without outright saying it you could sense it. In that moment he was the most sincere he has ever been with you, most open. All his walls torn down, pouring his soul out for you. How could you do anything other than confess your own love for him?

The days that followed had been the best ones yet. No one has ever made you feel this desired. Astarion was still a flirty little goblin but when it was just the two of you late at night he became gentler, a bit more romantic. Well, not quite since he had a twisted view on romance after two hundred years under Cazador, but his efforts always made your heart melt.

Not for a second did you feel the need to do anything more with him besides cuddling. Your first time with him was great, ignoring his cocky and sassy personality he could be an exceptionally gentle lover. But you understood how he felt and respected him and his boundaries. Besides, his big hand wrapped around yours when you walked from town to town, his head laying on your chest listening to your heartbeat while your fingers gently played with the curls you started to love, all of these innocent touches outweigh any need for his body in a more mature way.

Thing have been good, until you met Halsin. Then things became even better. He brought this new atnosphere to your little group. Since he wasn't infected you tried so hard to make him feel welcomed. Not that he looked like he needed it, but old habits die hard.

However he must've misinterpreted your kindness. You tried to hold in your scoff as he proposed polygamy to you. You, the biggest hopeless romantic who has already gotten her prince charming. Not in a way she expected or dreamed about but still. But his words did give her an idea.

To make Astarion jealous. He never showed any signs of jealousy, you never gave him a reason. And yet you still wanted to know what it felt like. Remembering your childhood friends having boys and girls alike fight over them. No one has ever fought for you. No one has ever pulled you into their body and glared at anyone who flirted with you despite your discomfort. All of these scenarios you experienced only through heroines in your romance novels.

Halsin gave you a perfect opportunity to experience it now! It may sound cruel, but you couldn't wait. Astarion has always addressed you as my love, my sweet, my darling, my, my, my. Surely he would be the possessive type. What would he do first? Pull you into him and kiss your mind senseless to remind you who you belong to? Or would he talk you out of a night of passion with Halsin? He does talk a lot but you really hoped he would do what every guy in your novels did. Minus the steamy scenes that sometimes followed, of course.

Oh, how wrong you were.

"Are you serious?" You asked, heartbroken.

His confident mask fell, confusion replacing it. "Yes? Did I say otherwise?"

Tears stung in your eyes. Was he really serious? Did he not mind one bit if you slept with another man? Did he love you so little? Did he love you at all? You knew his thoughts on love and genuine care could be a bit twisted and wrong but to this extent? To just throw you at any man that asks you as if you meant nothing to him. As if your nights together in eachother's embrace meant nothing to him.

Apparently your quivering lip and teary eyes wasn't the reaction he expected. He cupped your left cheek. "Sweetheart, did I do anything wrong?"

You slapped his hand away. "You did everything wrong. I-," you looked away, hoping your tears of disapointment and anger wouldn't fall, "I thought we had something."

"We do! Of course we do. But I can't hold your hunger against you. Trust me, I understand what it feels like, to desire something and seldom acquire it."

"But it's you who I desire!" A tear fell. "And not in terms of sex. It's your care, teasing, love. All of that," you sniffled. "All of you."

Now Astarion was more confused than before. "But... your talk with the druid. You were happy about his proposition. Are you telling me you turned him down?"

You nodded. "I did. I'm not the kind of girl to sleep with people I don't trust. I trust you. I love you. Even without sleeping with you I want to stay by your side. Is that so hard to believe?"

"Well yes, concidering your type."

"My type?"

"Oh please," he sighed. "Look at him for goodness sake. Luscious brown hair reaching his shoulders, a huge scar, no facial hair. Features you were positively gushing about right infront of me."

Realization hit you just as hard as old memories. You remember that night. He has offered you some of his wine and some flirty lines as well. You humored him back then. "You... you remember that?"

He looked away, arms crossed, tips of his pointy ears flushed. "Of course I do. How could I forget the first person not falling for my charm? I simply made a mental note in case we ever come across some shape changing potion so I could fit your standards. It was purely for research."

You smirked. "Oooor, could it be," you took a step closer to him, hands clasped behind your back making you look innocent and almost childishly teasing, "that perhaps you've started liking me by that point?"

He groaned. "Hells woman, I don't know. I've stopped writing myself a diary since lomg ago."

"It's not a no," you said in a sing-song voice.

Before he could turn away you cupped his cheeks and made his pouty self face you. "Listen, if I didn't know either of you and you'd be walking down the street as complete strangers to me, true, I would ignore your pale vampiric ass over Halsin any time of the day."

Annoyed, Astarion rolled his eyes and went in to push your hands away from his face but you held still. You gently place couple of soft kisses over his cheekbones and continued. "But personality plays a big role in who my heart belongs to. If both of you walked down the street now I'd jump into your arms without a second thought. And not because of what either of you look like."

You stood on your tippy toes and kissed his forhead. "It's your sense sarcasm," kiss on the bridge of his nose, "dry and sometimes downright wrong sense of humor," you drag your lips gently along his nose, "your playfulness that keeps your old ass young," he scoffed but let you peck the tip of his nose, "your wit, your charm, your passion. And I do mean outside of the bed," you clarified as you kept giving his face little kisses.

His arms held onto your waist as you listed off all of the qualities he may or may not possess. If he physically could he would be purring like a cat right now. "Darling, you sure do know how to stroke my ego."

"Oh really? Maybe I should stop. I don't want you to become too spoiled after all," you teased but you both knew you didn't mean a single word.

He hummed, which almost did sound like a cat's purr. "Or maybe I should just tease out all the ways you wanted me to react out of you. Was it this?" Without a warning he yanked you into his chest, forcefully but not too violently. One of his hands slowly moved from your waist up between your shoulderblades, carressing your back with just his fingertips, making you shiver.

"Or this?" He leaned down, his nose brushing against yours, cold undead lips close enough to feel his breath on your mouth but too far away for an actual contact.

Despite his torturous teasing you giggled. "Actually, I already got my reaction."

"You did?" He dropped the sauve seductive act completely and pulled back anough to properly look you in the eyes.

"Yeah. I mean it wasn't the same as in my books, and definitely not what I expected. But it was better. It was real."

You snaked your arms around his neck. "Besides, if you did everything as I expect you to, it wouldn't be half as much fun with you now would it?"

Smiling he closed his eyed and rested his forhead on yours. "No, it definitelly wouldn't, darling. Although," his mouth twusted inti a devilish smirk. Oh no.

In one swift movement he scooped you up over his shoulder making his way towards your shared tent. A concept of secluded tents has gone out the window once Astarion realized how wonderful a warm body feels against his throughout the night.

"I'd love to know precisely what kind of books you've read before my glorious presense took over your love life."

You struggled against his grasp a bit but quickly gave up. Not because it was impossible to break free but because, as embarassing as it was to admit, you liked how he carried you. Being manhandled by him wasn't so bad from time to time.

"You'd be bored out of your mind. Most of them were cheesy novels for hopeless romantics."

He entered the tent and gently layed you down on your side of the bedroll. He turned to close the flaps to give the two of your desired alone time and said: "Well, to each their own I suppose. But who knows, maybe I can get an inspiration from some of them. Making your silly childhood dreams of knights in shining armors and princesses become a reality."

After he was done he layed down and assumed his favourite position. Head on your chest, ear right over your heart, arms holding you close to him. Instead of playing with his hair as always your hands cradled his head, thumb brushing his cheek.

"My love, you've already made so many of them a reality."

He chuckled into your chest, one hand coming up to angle your wrist so he could kiss your pulse. "Surely there must be some I haven't."

There were. Those where they lived happily ever after.

But those had time.

[baldursgate3tempobsessed]

Okay so thought would Astarion just be uber happy if tav is just clinging to him and is like let me stay here where it is safe for just a little longer pleaseee

I think I'm feeling the energy. And it's an actual drabble instead of a novel! Cw: In-game references, spoilers, but this is just some fluffy fluff fluff.

~

When Astarion made the decision to seduce you, it had been based in cold rationality. In the short time he had known you, you had proven to be intelligent, capable, attractive enough for sex to not feel like a total burden, and extremely hard to kill. Using a falsified relationship to wrap you around his finger was the easy choice for survival. And it did work, with varying results.

Because you provided many, many complications. Like the unfortunate reality that Astarion quickly had grown sincerely fond of you. Not only were you impressively competent, you were fun. Hilariously bitchy in a way that never failed to make him laugh. But you were still kind, kind in a meaningful way that Astarion was simply not used to.

It had felt like a shock when you were so adamant about his right to be his own person. When you didn't make him bite that drow cretin he was struck with the realization that you actually cared about him. What that thing had been offering in return would no doubt have been useful to your journey, but you didn't even give it a second thought. And Astarion wouldn't soon forget how you saying, "He said no," with so much conviction had sent a shiver up his spine.

Perhaps the whole event sent him into a tailspin that ended with him admitting his, in-hindsight, horrible plan, but it had been worth it in the end. Gods knows why, but you didn't abandon him when he revealed the truth. You just listened. You listened and opened up your mind for him to see just how much you cared for him. A care he perhaps didn't deserve, but one he would take. Even if he had no idea what the two of you were doing anymore.

But he did know that something shifted in your relationship after that, the birth of a new kind of trust. Apparently, Astarion hadn't been the only one holding back.

Because seemingly overnight, you got a lot more touchy. A facet of yourself that he really had not seen coming. Not sexually, no. You had been nothing but a dream when it came to understanding the hang-ups he had with that particular topic. But you did suddenly decide that you loved holding hands. You loved hugging him, for no reason at all. The two of you went from the occasional night together before parting ways to simply sharing a tent. And gods were you a cuddler. Every morning he would wake up with you wrapped around him, peaceful and at ease as you slept in his arms.

And... it was nice. Really, really nice. Astarion had always assumed that he would loathe being with someone who was so tactile. But it turned out when every little touch wasn't leading to mediocre and/or horrifying sex they were actually quite enjoyable. It felt good to have you so close, to know that you felt safe and comfortable with him of all people. Nice enough for Astarion to slowly get addicted to it. He wasn't quite sure when his favorite past time became reading while you laid on top of him, but he knew it claimed to top spot with startlingly speed.

Even now, with Cazador still looming, the tadpoles still squirming behind your eyes, worries and responsibilities abound, Astarion felt completely at peace. He was laying flat on his back on his bed roll, a book in one hand and the other carefully petting your hair as you dozed off; your body completely draped over him. He'd have to wake you sooner than later. Baldur's Gate was only a day's journey away now, and if you wanted to make it there before nightfall then everyone would have to get moving. He could already hear the sound of the others shuffling about.

He snapped his book shut, setting it to the side before he gently shook you, "It's time to rise and shine darling, Baldur's Gate won't be saving itself."

You mumbled as you buried your face into his chest, your words slurred, "Don't wanna. Too early."

That was another change with this newfound phase of trust. Astarion had become the only person who knew your little secret of not being a morning person. In the first few moments of wakefulness, you were at your clingiest, your whiniest, surprisingly your most honest, and arguably your most adorable state of the day. A fact that you actively hid from the rest of the group out of sheer embarrassment, but Astarion thought it was cute.

Not to mention that it made him feel special, oddly enough. That he was the only one who was allowed to see you like this; who could take care of you like this.

Astarion laughed at your response, "Tell that to the sun sweetheart. It's high-time we got going."

Despite his own words, he wasn't really doing much to move the process along. If anything he was hindering it when he wrapped his arms around you, only helping to make you more comfortable instead of less.

But then again, maybe he wasn't quite ready to let you go yet either.

You shook your head against him, your hands tightening on the fabric of his shirt, "Le'mme stay, just a little longer."

"That's easy for you to say when you're not the one to get Lae'zel's wrath," Astarion lightly argued, still making no moves to actually hurry this process along. But it was true, Lae'zel always blamed your lateness on him, her favoritism towards you blatantly obvious. The bitch. But at least she was a bitch with good taste, "I would prefer not to be murdered by a gith for being tardy."

But you were already back to being half-asleep, your internal filter completely disintegrated as you mumbled, "Feels safe here, with you. Don't wanna let it go yet. Please?"

Gods, how the in the nine hells was Astarion supposed to say no to that? He didn't. Instead the grip he had on you only tightened, the happy little sigh you let out at the movement striking him straight through the heart. He felt so... happy in that moment, through nothing more than the simplicity of holding you. Because you trusted him. You felt safe with him, which might as well have been a love confession in Astarion's world. It felt so good to have this, an intimacy that he'd been denied for centuries.

Astarion settled back, letting his own eyes close as he smiled. The others would get the two of you eventually, but until then he wasn't going anywhere. No, the two of you would be staying right here.

[astarionancuntnin]

Hyello! I don’t know if you do requests but I thought I’d ask so the request is that x reader is honestly pretty badass and Astarion does something that pisses her off and so she barges into his tent after a long day to tell him off and fight him but decides that amidst the anger there is also hunger and decides theres a a way he can make it up to her and smutty content insues, preferably very like animalistic?? think closer by nine inch nails lol i do like the idea that they're both fighting for dominance in the interaction, you choose which one wins lol hope I’m not bothering you

did i listen to closer on repeat to bring you this? perhaps

and i never really put it out there, but hell yeah im taking requests! thank you for being my first <3

(also thank you for your patience i was heavily focused on my last chapters for die for you before approaching this ask and then it really went overboard LMAO you said "animalistic" and i took it literally, i hope you enjoy!)

Run, Little Fox

pairing: astarion x reader!ranger!tav

rating: E

word count: 5.1k

cw: 18+. smut, biblicaly accurate Astarion primal!astarion, predator/prey, knife play (if you squint), rivals/hate sex, mildly dubious consent, fighting for dominance, p in v, blood/vampire bites, creampie, very slight somnophilia (but id rather mention it, never too safe)

read on ao3

my masterlist

or keep reading down below~

That’s it. 

That was once too many.

This brat of a rogue had gotten on your nerves more times than you could recall, and today you decided you had enough. Your group trusted and respected your position as their leader, a brave and cunning ranger whose decisions everyone agreed with — as they were for the greater good — so why couldn’t he do the same? It wasn’t enough that he questioned your every move in front of everyone else, no, he grew bored of you ignoring his remarks. He just had to act on his impulses and get you in trouble this time. 

You had intended on getting information out of a group of adventurers, when he had tried to pickpocket them in the middle of your discussion, and when he got caught, things obviously went south. You tried to talk things down, but they wouldn’t hear it. One thing led to another and next thing you know, they laid in a pool of their own blood and you stood with no more information than you started with. All of it, because of him, and he had the gall to say it was your own fault for not defusing the situation better. Really?!

The stress of this adventure — the impending doom that those tadpoles in your brains were — was already enough weight on your shoulders, you didn’t want to deal with Astarion’s trickery on top of it anymore. No — you couldn’t. You had enough of his unnerving attitude; enough of his shameless flirting when it was clear you weren’t interested; enough of his impetuous disdain and insolence that matched your own. Tonight, you would set the record right.

Once back at camp after this horrendous, unending day by his side, the first thing you do after dropping your loot and equipment at your tent, is bolt straight for Astarion’s. 

Still covered in a mix of your sweat, today’s unfortunate souls’ blood — and your own — you burst through the entrance of Astarion’s tent without so much as a warning to find him peacefully laying, with one arm behind his head and the other already flipping through the pages of a book he had found, and most certainly stolen, during today’s stroll.

He barely lifts his head to notice your intrusion, his eyes darting your way, half-lidded. “Looking for a cuddle?” 

The sheer audacity of the smirk he gives you. 

“You—” You fully step into his tent, staring him down with an anger that couldn’t be contained, as you close the flaps behind you, “Have been a pain in my ass for long enough.”

He scoffs, “Darling, we haven’t been close like that yet — unless this is your way of asking?” He closes his book and puts it aside to focus on you, as he rests on his elbows, his taunting smile never leaving his lips. What you wouldn't give to wipe it away from his smug face.

“The last thing I want is you anywhere near me.”

“You see,” he checks his nails, bored. “I have a hard time believing that, dear.”

“Get over yourself.” You cross your arms over your chest, annoyed at how well he could annoy you. “What makes you think I want anything to do with you after the commotion you caused today?”

“For one, you came to me, in my tent. If that's not a dead giveaway, I don't know what is,” his eyes dart back to you. “And to further prove that point, you still haven’t left — even though you claim I am the reason for your frustration. Really, it's as if you relished my company after all.”

You open your mouth to contradict him, but your words are left hanging when he gets up, his shirt slightly unbuttoned revealing the lines of his muscles concealed underneath and you can’t help but let your eyes wander longer than you intended, gulping as you do so. He chuckles lightly before he speaks up again.

“Secondly, I’ve seen the way you’ve been looking at me.”

Your eyes shoot up to his face again, and you ask defensively, “Would you rather have me not look at you?”

He gives you a mischievous look as he eyes you up and down, and he meets your gaze with just as much intensity.

“Third, and lastly, I can smell you, darling.”

“I haven't washed yet.”

“You know that isn't what I'm referring to.”

Your heartbeat quickens, as the air seems to draw out of the tent, “Well, whatever you think this is, isn't your doing,” you lie plainly in the hopes he buys it, but his smirk leads you to believe he sees right through it.

“You’re not fooling anyone but yourself, dearest.” He tilts his head, a long silence settling in between the two of you, with your breathing as the only sound audible in the space of his tent. “Maybe… There's another reason you might be frustrated. That all this, pent up anger building inside, is because of something else that you can’t control.” He closes the distance between the two of you, stopping but a whisper away from your face, and his voice gets lower, deeper. “Something that you would rather not have to deal with, but for some reason just can’t get rid of. Something that just rubs you the wrong way, and is the same reason why you can’t help but want to stay in my presence.” 

You scoff, challenging his gaze, “If that something you’re referring to is you, Astarion, then you’re right — you are the sole reason of my frustration as of late, but I could do without your irritating presence.”

“Oh, but I could make it much more pleasurable.” 

You lean back, and turn your head aside, trying to make some distance between the two of you, ”You give yourself too much credit.”

He slides a finger down your throat, leaving an unexpected shiver in its wake as he exposes your neck, when he pushes your vagabond strands of hair away, before he continues.

“Why don’t you give me a chance to show you exactly what I mean? We would both benefit from this, really; I could fix your predicament, and in exchange, I could receive… a little something from you in return.”

You contemplated the opportunity laid before you for just a second before opting for the reasonable choice. You grab his hand, pulling it away from you and when you speak up again, the anger in your voice is gone, leaving place for your much smoother, yet very assertive tone. “If you want my blood, you’ll have to earn it.”

You release his hand and he keeps it in the air where you left it, cocking his head to the side as he looks at where your hand had held him, “Earn it, you say?”

You nod, “We wouldn’t want you to become soft now, would we?” A smile of your own takes place on your lips. “If I am to be your meal, it’s only fair that you work for it.”

His eyes dart back to yours as a smirk appears on his lips, “I’m all pointy ears.”

“I’ll be hiding in the woods. If you can find and catch me, you get to drink from me. But if I catch you instead, you’re never getting a drop from me.”

He sighs, “That’s hardly a fair proposition, darling.” As you’re about to contradict him, he continues, “Here’s mine instead: if you catch me, fine — I’ll keep chasing boars and whatnot in the woods — but if I catch you…” He leans over the crook of your neck, whispering. “I get to drink from you every. night.”

You grab him by the chin, bringing him face to face with you, “If I catch you, you don’t get to put the party at risk anymore. You will be kicked out of the camp if you do.” If you had to put your vitality on the line, he had to bet something just as valuable.

His fangs glow in the faint lighting of his tent as he smiles. “Deal.”

You drop his chin as he steps back and you notice how something about him seems to be shifting; the pupils of his eyes widen, darkening; his own breathing stops; the hands at his side turning into claws, with his long and sharp nails peaking out, ready to hunt. There was nothing left of the rogue in distress that you picked up a few weeks ago, who could’ve pretended to be nothing more than an innocent, but rather pale, elf. 

When he opens his mouth to speak again, you spy his elongated fangs; much longer than you remember them to be, and his voice—

“Run.”

You don’t lose a second more; the vision of nightmares before you triggered your fight or flight reaction and without your weapons, the choice was clear. You turn around and slide through the flaps of his tent, bolting straight for your tent, where you quickly manage to pick up your trusty dagger and your set of bow and arrows.

Thankfully, everyone else at camp had gone off to bed, so no one notices you as you pick a frantic run towards the deep woods, making distance from the hungry vampire on your tracks. 

The woods are dark, with only the faint light of the moon guiding your tracks. Once far enough, or so you think, you hide behind a tree to control your breathing; you had no intention to lose to this, you needed all the advantages you could get. With your experience as a ranger, you were almost assured to catch him off guard.

Almost.

What you had seen in his tent before sprinting off was like nothing you had ever seen before. Of course, you knew Astarion was a vampire, but this was… different.

Terrifying. 

A beast, straight out of those scary bedtime stories you recall from your childhood; a monster guided by his thirst for flesh and blood, who would show no mercy, no remorse. It was merely enough to make you question this challenge with him, Gods, how embarrassing would it be to lose your life to a stupid game you had initiated purely out of spite?

The rustling of leaves nearby brings you back into focus, the adrenaline in your veins keeping you on edge for any sound. You ready your bow before you peek out of your hiding spot to aim where you heard the sound and wait patiently for another moment, your eyes never leaving the bush right until you hear another crack — right when you release the arrow, your aim striking true as you hear a loud thud. You wait a few more seconds, and when no sound can be heard from the bushes you leave your cover, advancing towards your prey. When you push the branches away, you’re face to face with none other than—

A boar.

Shit. Well — guess you caught your next meal.

Another rustling of leaves has you drawing out your bow again, ready to strike, but you’re unable to tell where it comes from.

“How does it feel, little fox?” You hear him through the woods, his deep and raspy, but unnatural voice almost echoing through you. “To be the one being hunted?”

“I’m hunting you, too, in case you forgot,” you mumble mostly to yourself, not wanting to draw out more attention and telling on your location. 

Although you were confident in your capacities, you couldn’t deny the fear building up in your chest. The unnerving feeling of knowing he was around, knowing he was onto you, but unable to find him through the dense woods, the reminder of what he looked like before you ran for your life, a creature of darkness—

“Keep running, you delicious little thing,” his voice already seems to be coming from somewhere else, where exactly you couldn't tell, as if he was constantly moving and it came from everywhere all at once. “You’re making this too easy for me.”

Damn him. He could be anywhere, it was useless to stay there, out in the open, when he was clearly onto you. Then again, he could also intentionally be pushing you to run, only to lead you into a trap of his, right where he wanted you to be. 

No, you’re smarter than this. You won't let your emotions get in the way of this: you were a hunter, born and raised for this kind of situation.

He is just another prey; you can outsmart him. You are better than him.

You put away your bow and arrows; you know your long range weapons would be of no use to you if you couldn’t see your target. If he’s trying to make you run, he has to be further ahead, so the smart choice would be to go back on your tracks.

You turn on your heels in a heartbeat and start sprinting in the opposite way, not even bothering to look behind you for any sign of him, as you hear the clear rustling of branches around you. At this moment, you know he’s right on your tail, the sounds of the forest barely covering the sound of his own movements between the trees — if that was even him. You assume it is, but who’s not to say it isn’t just another boar? Either way, all you can do now is keep running, hoping he will tire before you.

But you were against a creature of the night, someone — or rather something, now — much more in its element, in the darkness of the woods, than you were. 

You don’t run for long before you stop abruptly in your tracks to change directions, leaving the clear road for the crowded forest, where you think you could lose him.

You're temporarily reassured when you don't hear him anymore, and allow yourself to breathe again. Your heart is pounding in your chest, faster than ever, as the fear of being chased — of your life being on the line — created a warmth within you that pooled right down to your core. The risk of being caught, as for once you’re the prey, and you can’t explain it, but it excites you. Although Astarion had gotten on your every nerve, you had to give it to him — he was right that his unnerving attitude had gotten a rise out of you in the most carnal way — but you’d never admit it to his face.

A good minute passes by with no sign of him, and you feel safe enough to peek out of your hiding spot, investigating the beaten path for any sign of life. When you’re met with a dead silence, you move away from the tree you had been leaning against, only to come face to face with Astarion, who drops from the branches just above you. His eyes are somehow a much deeper shade of red, his pupils fully blown out, and he even seems taller as he smiles down on you, and that’s when you perceive the additional fangs that appeared next to the smaller ones you knew. 

You’re fixated on his sudden presence, assessing your opponent the way you would a wild animal, and you remain unmoving, focused on your own breathing.

“Nowhere left to run, I’m afraid,” the voice that comes out of his mouth is otherworldly, almost a growl and nothing like his sultry voice he used to try and charm you before. It’s as if anything that once made him pass as a mortal was gone the second you ran off from him.

You want to turn around and sprint in the opposite direction, but he's faster than your thoughts. Before you can even move a finger, he grabs you by your neck, his sharp nails digging into your skin enough to draw blood as he pushes you against the nearest tree, slightly lifting you from the ground. Instinctively, you reach for your dagger, but he is fast to catch onto your intentions and takes it away from you, throwing it on the ground far from reach. With no other options left, you reach for his hand around your neck, trying to hold on as your vision blurs from the chokehold he had on you. 

“Caught you, little fox,” he leans into your neck where you bled from to breathe you in, and licks your skin from the bottom of your neck up to your jaw, tasting your sweat mixed with the dry blood left on you. Your camp clothing leaves you dangerously exposed as opposed to your armour, and he had every intention to take advantage of it. “You will make a fine meal indeed.”

He presses his entire body against you, and you can feel not only his oddly cold breath down your neck, but also his hard bulge rubbing against your navel, right above the heat between your legs. 

A particularly bad idea crosses your mind, and you know you’ll blame it on the lack of oxygen later, but for now, it’s the only option you have.

Your hand slides down to his crotch, where you squeeze his length through his trousers, making him shudder against you and loosening his grip on your throat. You take this chance to free yourself as you quickly push him away and against the earthy ground of the forest, pinning him down using your entire body weight. You land right next to your knife and grab it just in time before he comes to his senses, now holding it against his throat.

“I win,” you say, breathless, over him.

You remain unmoving, with the threat of your knife keeping him in place, but unsure what to do next — until he laughs. You’re taken aback, but you keep your position, pressing your blade deeper into his throat.

“Well done.” His voice softens, still deeper than what you’re used to, but less guttural than it was a minute ago. “You have me completely and utterly helpless. What will you do next, I wonder?”

You don’t get to answer before you feel him moving under you, his hardness rubbing against that sweet spot between your legs. Your breathing quickens once again, caught off guard by the delicious movement of his hips against you.

“What do you think you’re doing?” You ask, the words almost getting stuck in your throat.

“Fulfilling my part of the bargain, of course.”

“That’s not—” he lifts his hips higher, the tip of his crotch rubbing against your clit, and your body tenses at the contact. He’s rock hard and between your thin camp clothes, it's almost as if you were rubbing skin to skin against each other. A pleasurable shiver running across your spine, and you allow yourself to close your eyes for just a moment, fighting between giving in to your desires or stopping yourself from letting this go any further; it was clear which side of you was winning over, as your hunger for that something more was becoming impossible to ignore. You soften your grip on his wrist and your dagger against his throat, and that’s all he needs to gain back dominance over you, flipping you back under him and seizing your wrists to pin you down the same way you had him only seconds ago.

“Now,” he says, “this is much better, don’t you think?”

“Oh you prick,” you groan, fighting to free yourself from his grip on you, but he only tightens his grasp around your wrists. His immortal strength beats yours and your hand twists under his crushing grip, making you finally release your knife.

You curse under your breath for letting yourself be bested by the most annoying member of your party; the one who you had dreamed to put back in his place was now dominating you instead. A mix of anger and shame swirls in your stomach, along with something else that you want to deny, but can’t for the life of you understand.

Your eyes meet his, dark and hungry and so incredibly close to you. His lack of breath is strange in comparison to yours, so heavy that your chest rises with each breath you take, brushing against him. It wasn't a position you were used to, either, and you find yourself liking it more than you thought you would; with his entire body pining against yours, his legs surrounding yours and keeping them closed together, your wrists held strongly above your head; a prey caught by her predator.

You remain unmoving in this position for what feels like an eternity, until he licks his lips, his eyes falling to the space in your neck that was exposed just for him.

He leans into you, his deep voice shooting a warmth straight to your core. “This little game of yours made me quite hungry.”

You gasp when you feel his bulge rubbing against you once more and touching that sweet spot that made you rub your thighs together. 

“Perhaps,” he whispers, “you've grown an appetite of your own, little fox?”

You take a few breaths, "If you wanna feed, be my guest. You…” you sigh, defeated. “You earned it. Just— be quick about it.”

You turn your head aside, looking away and giving him space to feed, only for him to lean back, “Quick? Oh darling, you’re mistaken if you don’t think I won’t draw this out as long as I possibly can.”

He pushes your wrist up above your head where he can hold them both with one hand, while his other hand slides down to your chest, his sharp nails grazing against the curve of your breast. You close your eyes as his hand continues its journey down your navel, and into your pants, rubbing against the moist spot that kept growing in your panties.

“But don’t worry — I’ll make sure we both get our fill tonight,” he growls.

Your hips move of their own accord, wanting more of him and his touch, almost against your own will.

“Greedy, greedy, little fox.” He flashes a toothy smile, “Can't get enough? I'm not surprised.”

Your eyes open back up and you stare at him, frustrated, “Gods, do you ever shut up?”

“You have such a way with words.” He sighs, pulling his hand out of your pants. “You know, it's a wonder we haven't gotten killed because of your social prowess.”

“If you think you’re so much better than me, why don’t you—”

His lips collide with yours into an hungry kiss, one bold enough to shut you right up. A part of you is disgusted, furious, even, that he would push himself onto you, but your body’s reaction betrays you, as you kiss him back with the same intensity. It’s sloppy, his elongated tongue invading your mouth and rubbing against yours, until he bites into it and sucks, letting your crimson hit his lips. 

You moan as you pull back, rolling your tongue around to feel the puncture he made, and he smiles down on you, his teeth tainted by your blood.

“Ah… delicious.”

Something comes over you, a supernatural strength — almost animalistic — and you flip him back around on his back to take control once again. Your dishevelled hair frames your face over him, and he gets to see you panting, teeth bared, with angry eyes towering over him. There's a flash of surprise in his eyes before they take back their lusty look, and his hands fly to your shirt, ripping it open as his nails tear through the fabric as if it were air. Your shirt is quickly discarded, exposing your skin to the cool night air that raises the hairs on your back.

In the frenzy, you give the same treatment to his shirt, using that strength to destroy his clothing and revealing the very muscles you spied earlier in his tent. He raises himself up to meet you where you sat over his hips, his mouth finding yours  and kissing you feverishly as he did before, while his hands work to remove your pants. 

With a grunt from him, you're pushed back on the harsh forest ground where he rips away your trousers, leaving you only with your panties to cover you. You gasp into his mouth, breathing in his cold breath, when the night air that matches his breath hits the thin fabric of your undergarments. The shock of temperature affects you more than you had anticipated, as you are completely soaked from your arousal that had pooled down there since the beginning of the night. Astarion instantly notices it, and laughs ominously.

“Are you still going to deny it now?” He pushes your underwear aside and slides his dexterous fingers between your folds, discovering just how dire your situation is. “Hells, look at how wet you are, just for me.”

His fingers feel good, and fucking Hells you didn’t want to admit it — he was an absolute asshole — but that ship had sailed a while ago, and now you just wanted to know how good he would feel inside you.

“If you still want to feed, you better do it now before I change my mind,” you groan.

“Change your mind?” He scoffs. “I'm afraid that isn't an option. I won fair and square, little fox; now I get to devour you every night.” He flips you around, the sudden roughness of the earthy floor rubbing against your sensitive nipples making you gasp in surprise. You feel him move behind you, and you're not sure how or when it happened, but he must've removed his own trousers as you feel the ghost of his cock hovering just over your entrance. Your heart threatens to burst out of your chest with anticipation, and this feeling goes into your throat when he grabs you by the nape of your hair and pulls you into him, making you arch your back and clearly exposing your neck to him in the process. “Starting tonight.”

Within the same beat, he thrust into you, his hips slamming hard against your skin, and his fangs dive into the crook of your neck, finally taking what is rightfully his.

You cry out at the stabbing pain in your neck, this one much more different than the first time he bit you, as his elongated fangs dive deeper into your neck to draw out more of your life source, and the additional fangs leave more marks into your skin. It hurts and yet, you find your core growing warmer and wetter; between his bite and his reckless thrusting into you, with the added sensation of his initially cool skin getting warm from your blood. His thrusts gain in speed and force, and in that position, there is nothing else you can do but take it.

Even as you try to reach behind you with that last remaining will to have control, to grab his hair and pull him forward, Astarion takes a hold of your arm and pushes back against you, using his entire body weight to hold you firmly against the rough ground, and his hips to slam into your needy, little cunt. With your hair still pulled back, but your wrist now stuck in his grasp, he continues to take his fill of you with no restriction.

“Look at you, finally put in your place,” he growls as he licks up the drops of blood leaking from the fresh wounds in your neck. “Is this what you’ve been desiring all these times your eyes got lost at the sight of my body? What you’ve been dreaming of? To be properly used, like a bitch in heat? Ravaged by a beast?”

You manage to get a few words out between rushed breaths, sneering.

“F— Fuck. Y— You.”

He snickers wickedly, “I guess that answers my question. Don’t worry, pet. Your secret’s safe with me.”

“Oh you—”

“Shh now,” Before you can even finish your sentence, his hand quickly moves from your wrist to your mouth, muffling any sounds coming from you. “We wouldn’t want to risk waking our dear friends, now, would we? Unless that’s what you want?” You groan in the palm of his hand and he chuckles. “You depraved little thing. I’ll give you just what you desire.”

His hand previously holding your hair goes down your body to hold your hips in place as he fucks you, and his teeth sink into your shoulder on the other side of your neck. The gesture meant only to keep you steady as he fucks you senseless. With his fangs deep into your skin, his nails cutting the soft skin of your hips and his dick pounding your abused cunt, you scream into his hand as you reach your climax. It’s nerve wracking, mind shattering, and leaves you completely drained. 

With a final push inside you, Astarion’s hips still and he growls into your neck, taking his last sip of you, as he pulses around your inner walls, filling you up with his warm seed. Your muscles fail you, as your body goes limp against the earthy ground, and you barely feel anything else — leaving you almost unconscious. Behind you, Astarion pulls out of you, and a weak moan escapes you as you feel his load leaking out of you.

While you’re recuperating from this treatment, Astarion loses his monstrous features: his nails retract, his pupils go back to those annoyingly charming red ruby eyes, his fangs retract just enough to fit back into his mouth, and he mimics breathing again; now passing as a mortal again.

With the minimal strength you manage to gain back, you push yourself up, and gather the few pieces of clothes that were shredded during your nightly session; tomorrow you would definitely need to find new camp clothes, these were the only ones you had and they were utterly ruined. Thank the Gods everyone else was fast asleep and you’ll be able to walk back to your tent without any remarks.

As you’re about to take your leave, completely disregarding the rogue who looked just as messy as you were, you hear him clear his throat.

“It’s always a pleasure to be doing business with you, my dear. I’ll see you tomorrow night.”

You roll your eyes before shooting him a glare. “Don’t push your luck.” Your cheeks still flushed, your hair all over the place, and your form barely clothed, making you not as convincing as you had hoped for. 

You only catch a glimpse of his smirk in response to you as you walk away, and when you catch yourself actually looking forward to it, you tell yourself it's only for the opportunity to put him back in his place. 

Perhaps another white lie to coat your true feelings, but no one needed to know about that.

tag list (comment or message me if you want to be added!): @grimistheangerinmystares @silverfangmarks @roguishcat @nyx-knox @anacdoce @jwera @annnagennnie @angeldarkness95 @marlowethebard @hellethil @frankie-mercury @ariajc79 @lets-just-daydream

[truerhearts]

FOREVER

ANONYMOUS ASKED:

I was thinking something along the lines of it’s been about a year or 2 after the end of defeating the absolute and Astarion is wanting to propose to Tav. Due to him trying to plan everything he’s been a bit distant and sneaky so Tav who has had relationship issues in the pasts suspects him of cheating and/or maybe fears he wants to leave. They end up fighting cuz he of course is hurt and upset that she would ever suspect him of such things. Maybe have her run off after the fight and ends up caught by bandits which he saves her from. Happy ending with apology, proposal and some sexy time

𖤝 astarion x fem!reader

𖤝 3rd person person limited - reader | 9.4k words

𖤝 rating: 18+ | nsfw !!!

𖤝 summary: astarion's is bad at feelings yet again when he starts being secretive and won't tell you why. you start suspecting the worst and it all comes to a head one night

𖤝 warnings: violence, blood, weaponizing trauma!!!!, sex (soft and sensual)

𖤝 masterlist | ao3 | requests

⟡ ݁₊ .

It had been nearly two years since the fall of the Absolute. Nearly two years since that damn tadpole had festered in her mind, stealing thoughts and injecting its own. Two years since the looming threat of becoming a mind flayer at any moment was their reality. Two years since then, and the world had begun to remember peace again. The sun rose clearly over the rooftops, and life resumed, for some.

For (y/n), it was a different kind of journey.

Two years of building something fragile and intimate with Astarion – her companion, her lover, her impossible, brilliant, vampire spawn. It had been both rewarding and terrifying. The danger had passed, and everyone had left to continue their own journeys. They all kept in touch of course. But now it was just her and him.

She never expected anything to last after the tadpole. Whether that be due to their untimely demise, or perhaps just circumstance. She thought the kiss they shared before going on to face the elder brain would truly be their last.

The kiss was one she’d never forget:

The sky dark and muddied, fire scorching the crumbling building, the wind tearing through as if it were trying to sweep them away, the distant screams of the people in the city below, it all came to a screeching halt as she gazed into his crimson eyes. There was fear in them, fear that mirrored her own.

His hand cupped her face, thumb stroking her cheek, brushing against the grime that had accumulated. She leaned into his cold touch, tears threatening to escape her eyes.

“Don’t cry,” He whispered. “We made it this far.”

She tried to stop it, but a tear rolled down her cheek.

He took a shaky breath. “I desperately want to tell you that everything is going to be okay, but… I don’t want to lie.” He let out a half-laugh. “I honestly don’t know if we’ll still be alive in an hour!” He swallowed thickly, eyes scanning every inch of her face. “But what I do know, is that these last few months with you have been the best of my life. And I want to thank you, for everything.”

He leaned in and pressed a kiss firmly to her lips, both hands cupping her face, gripping her like he didn’t want to let go. He kissed her like it would be the last.

But it wasn’t

Thank the gods.

Now, here she was, living each day beside him.

Life for her had changed. They had carved out a home together in a tucked-away villa near the cliffs just outside Baldur’s Gate and their days had fallen into a rhythm as natural as breathing. She’d wake up before dusk to heavy curtains drawn tight, the villa wrapped in protective darkness. Astarion would already be stirring beside her, cool, pale fingers tracing lazy patterns across her skin as he awoke from his meditative state. Those first moments were always her favourite, when he’d pull her closer with a contented sigh, burying his face in her neck like she was his home.

Because she was.

“Good evening, my love,” he’d murmur against her throat. She’d feel that familiar flutter in her heart.

She rearranged her entire life around his needs without a second thought. Where others saw sacrifice, she saw devotion. She worked in the gardens by moonlight, shopped in the markets before nightfall just before they closed, read by candlelight while he hunted or dealt with matters in the city. Their world had become one of shadows and moonlight, and she’d never been happier.

Astarion worshipped her in ways both grand and subtle. He’d bring her night blooming flowers that he said reminded him of her beauty, commissioned dresses for her in fabrics that felt like sin against her skin. But perhaps the most precious gift came after old enemies forced him into the city’s shadows for a terrifying night, leaving her to pace their villa in fear until he returned just as the sun was about to rise over the horizon.

The next evening, he presented her with a small, smooth stone. She pressed her fingers to it, feeling the warm magic that radiated. It was a sending stone, one of a pair.

“I never want you to feel alone again,” he said softly, pressing it into her palm. “We can communicate with each other now, no matter the distance. Just speak to it and I’ll hear your voice.”

And yet, it was in the small, everyday moments that his devotion shone the brightest. His gaze would follow her around their home with such devoted adoration; it sometimes made her blush. He’d pull her onto his lap when she tried to read, pressing kisses to her temple, her cheek, her neck.

“You’re perfect,” He’d whisper against her, the firelight glowing on his pale skin.

They were utterly, completely besotted with each other. Onlookers and those in their inner circle would roll their eyes at how they couldn’t stay apart for too long, how they’d get lost in their own little world even in company. She’d catch him staring at her with such intensity it made her heart race, and he’d simply smile that devastatingly beautiful smile and say, “I’d be a fool not to stare at something so exquisite.

But lately, something had changed.

Astarion was more distracted.

It started small, so small she almost didn’t notice. He’d disappear for long hours. Then when she did start noticing, he’d offer vague excuses and kisses that didn’t linger. She’d find him in his study sometimes, scrawling quickly on parchment, flinching and retracting when he heard her approach from behind. Then he started waking up early to check the mail before she did.

His eyes, always sharp and bright when he looked at her, seemed distant sometimes. He was still affectionate, more so some days – but there was a strange tension in the way he held her, like he was holding something back.

And that terrified her.

(Y/n) had been through too much to not recognize the signs. The subtle withdrawal, the ‘truths’ he’d give her that didn’t seem to add up. The way his hand would jerk away, and his defences would raise sky high when she’d press too hard about his absences.

She’d been left before. Lied to. Betrayed. And though Astarion had always seemed different – wounded like her but willing to heal – but doubt crept in, and it began whispering anxieties in her ear.

Tonight, it reached a breaking point.

He’d gone again, long past dusk. The wine she poured sat untouched beside her, its surface catching the firelight like blood. She desperately tried to focus on the book in her hand, but her thoughts spiralled: Was it someone else? A hunger he didn’t trust her to understand? Or had the weight of commitment… forever, become too much for him?

She twirled the sending stone, now enclosed in a necklace around her neck, in her fingers. She knew to use it mostly for emergencies, but she was anxious. To her, this was an emergency. She pressed the pads of her fingertips to it, feeling the warmth beginning to radiate as she softly whispered. “Astarion? Please, come home. I’m worried about you.”

She waited, and waited, and waited. But nothing. No response.

And to that, she drank. She downed the whole goblet, then poured herself another.

Her stomach writhed, her thoughts uncontrollable. She thought of him with another. His hand trailing up her back, his head in her neck, kissing, tasting.

She poured and drank. Another goblet down.

And then, she then did the unthinkable.

She tossed the book aside and poured a third goblet, the bottle of wine nearly empty now. Rising abruptly, she paced the villa with a kind of frantic, aimless purpose. She moved so quickly, the wine threatened to spill with each step. She was blinded by fury, and worry, and anger, and anxiety.

Most nights, she was home. Reading, occupying herself, spending time with Astarion – when he was home, of course. But not always. Sometimes she’d go out into the city for an evening with friends. Perhaps get some dinner and spend time at a tavern or lounge. Those nights would have been perfect for someone to slip in. The thought made her stomach twist beneath her ribs. 

She made it to their bedroom, placing her cup down on the mahogany dresser, some of it spilling. She didn’t notice, she was to preoccupied with other things. She looked for signs, anything she could. A stray earring? Maybe a hair that wasn’t hers? Gods forbid… underwear?

She scoured the bedroom, tossing up the pillows, throwing the blankets, lifting the mattress, shifting the entire bed over, but there was nothing. She went to the closet, tossing things, their belongings, her clothes, his clothes. Just anything that would prove her suspicions right.

But why did she so desperately want to be right about him possibly casting her aside for another.

She paused as she looked at his bedside table. She felt the strongest urge to rifle through his things… but she didn’t. She couldn’t. Not until she had more proof and reason to betray privacy like that.

Then, she heard the door open and close. She grabbed her wine from the dresser, not noticing it spilled yet again (though if she did, she probably wouldn’t have cleaned it anyways) and met him in the foyer.

She stood, arms crossed. Her goblet with streaks of wine down it caught the moonlight. “Where were you?” She emerged from the darkness.

He paused mid-step, eyes narrowing slightly. “… Out. I told you earlier I’d be late.”

She laughed, the wine doing its job. “You said an hour. It’s been close to six.” Her fingers were tingling.

He took off his cloak, slow and measured. “I had things to handle in the city. Business.” He looked back at her as he hung his cloak on the rack. “Have you been drinking?” He walked up to her. “Gods, (Y/n), how much? I can smell it on you.” He looked down at her bodice. “It’s even on your dress.”

The room beginning to spin, and her vision narrowed. She ignored his question. “Can you tell me about this… business?” she asked, the word slipping off her tongue like she’d tasted something vile. She fidgeted, shifting her weight from one leg to the other, looking up at him expectantly.

Irritation flashed so quickly across his face that she thought that she imagined it. Or maybe she did, she was drunk now, after all.

“Do we not trust each other now?” he questioned, stepping forward.

She, too, stepped closer, wine sloshing in the goblet, voice trembling. “I want to Astarion, but you’re pulling away. Being secretive. I’ve seen this before, the distance, the coldness… You don’t touch me the same. You don’t look at me the same.”

The wine was taking over rapidly. Hurt and anger and intoxication muddling into one horrible, dangerous mess. She wasn't normally an angry drunk. There had been so many nights where they'd venture to the local tavern for drinks and laughter, stumbling home together with Astarion's steady arm around her waist as she swayed against him. They'd collapse through their front door in a tangle of limbs and wine-sweet kisses, making love by the dying embers of the fire until dawn crept through the curtains. The alcohol had always made her soft and pliant in his arms, every touch electric, every sensation heightened.

But this was far different. This was wine laced with weeks of festering doubt, and it was all coming to a head tonight.

She continued. “If you’re fucking someone else just say it. Just leave me and spare me the heartache of not knowing. Because this, leading me on, lying to me, is worse than just saying I’m not good enough for you anymore.”

A mixture of rage and hurt riddled his face. His eyes looked like they were on fire. “Is that truly what you think of me? After everything? After what we’ve survived together?”

"I don't know. Do you really think I'm that stupid that I wouldn't catch on? That I'd sit here like some pathetic little pet, waiting for you to come home after entertaining someone else?"

His jaw clenched. “You’re being ridiculous. I would never – “

“Then where were you?” She snapped, cutting him off. “Six hours, Astarion. You said you were in the city ‘conducting business’.” She mimicked his voice. He would have found it funny in other circumstances. “Six hours, no word, no explanation. I thought maybe you went to hunt, maybe you were hungry. But when have you ever hunted for six hours! And then –“ She ripped the pendant off her neck. “This stupid stone! I called for you! I called and you didn’t answer. What else am I supposed to think?”

His eyes flashed dangerously. “You’re supposed to trust me, not interrogate me like some jealous harpy the moment I walk through the door. And perhaps you should put down the wine before we continue this conversation – you’re slurring your words, darling.” The word fell off his tongue like venom, no love in it.

“Trust?” She let out a bitter laugh, slipping the stone into the pocket in her skirt. “How can I trust you when you won’t even look at me in the eye anymore. When you flinch from my touch like I’m some stranger?”

“That’s not-“ He ran a hand through his silver hair. “It’s complicated.”

“Complicated?” She words came out as a shriek. “What’s complicated about honesty? Unless…”  Her voice turned vicious, the wine loosening her tongue. “Maybe you miss it, don't you? All those years of charming your way into people's beds. Maybe freedom means you can finally enjoy the hunt again—choose your own prey this time instead of Cazador choosing for you."

That struck a nerve within him. His voice rose, sharp, like a blade unsheathed. "How dare you." The words came out in a hiss, his fangs visible as his lips pulled back in a snarl. "Two hundred years. Two hundred years of being nothing more than a puppet, a pretty face to lure victims to their deaths, and you think—" His voice cracked with fury and pain. "You think I miss that? That I crave being used like a… like a whore again?"

His crimson eyes blazed with hurt so deep it cut through her wine-addled anger. “Gods… I… I can’t believe you’d say such a thing to me.” He swallowed thickly. "I thought you understood. I thought you, of all people, knew that what we have is the first real thing I've ever chosen. The first time I've ever wanted someone without compulsion, without orders, without fear."

His voice dropped to a whisper, but it carried more venom than his shouts. "But perhaps I was wrong."

The silence stretched between them like a chasm. The goblet trembled in her hands as the full weight of her words crashed over her like a wave. Gods, what had she done?

"Astarion, I—" Her voice cracked. "I didn't mean… I'm so sorry."

But he had already turned away, his shoulders rigid with pain. He was defeated, broken, wounded by her own hand. The sight of him like that made her stomach lurch with something that had nothing to do with the wine.

She stepped forward and grasped his shirt, pulling herself into his back. "Astarion, my love, please I’m so, so, so sorry," she whispered against his back, her voice breaking as tears soaked into his shirt. Her hands fisted in the fabric, clinging to him like he might disappear.  I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it, I swear I didn't mean it."

Her sobs came harder now, desperate and raw. "You're right, you're absolutely right about everything. What we have is real, it's the most real thing I've ever felt, and I—" Her voice cracked completely. "I ruined it. I ruined everything because I was drunk and stupid and jealous."

But even as she pressed closer, begging forgiveness into his spine, she could feel the rigid set of his shoulders, the way he held himself like stone. He didn't lean into her touch, didn't turn around, didn't offer her the comfort of his voice. He simply stood there, letting her cling to him while remaining utterly unreachable.

"Please say something," she whispered, but he only shifted slightly, not quite pulling away but not accepting her either—a gesture that somehow hurt worse than if he'd shoved her off entirely.

"I can't—" She choked on the words, stumbling toward the door. "I can't stay here. I can't look at you knowing what I just—" She wretched the door open.

The sound of the door handle turning seemed to snap something in him.

His hand shot out, fingers wrapping around her wrist with desperate gentleness. "Don't. Please. You can’t go out wandering in this state."

"Let go." Tears spilled down her cheeks, hot and bitter.

"What you said..." His voice was barely audible. "It hurt. More than you know. But you're upset, you've been drinking—"

"Let go." The words came out as a sob.

"Darling, please. Come upstairs with me. Get some rest. I can explain everything. We can talk when you're—"

"Let go!" She wrenched free with such force that she stumbled backward. The goblet flew from her hand, wine arcing through the air like drops of blood in the moonlight before shattering against the stone path.

She didn't look back as she fled into the darkness, leaving him standing in the doorway with her name dying on his lips.

She ran—stumbled, really, her feet catching on roots and rocks she couldn't see properly. The world tilted and swayed around her, trees blurring into dark smears, the path beneath her feet seeming to shift and roll like the deck of a ship. One moment the moon was spinning overhead, the next she was lurching sideways, her shoulder slamming into rough bark.

Her legs felt like water. She careened from tree to tree, using them to steady herself before pushing off again, deeper into the woods. The wine had turned her coordination to mush, her thoughts to scattered fragments. She just needed to get away, needed air, needed space to think without his hurt eyes following her.

A root caught her ankle, and she went down hard, palms scraping against the forest floor. She gasped for breath between sobs, the taste of wine bitter in her mouth.

She gasped for breath between sobs.

And then footsteps shuffled through the bushes.

“Well, now,” an unfamiliar voice in the shadows said. “Look at this,”

More footsteps joined the first, multiple sets, twigs snapping, dried leaves crunching beneath heavy boots.

Adrenaline cut through the wine's fog as she scrambled to her feet, using the nearest tree to haul herself upright. Her head spun violently from the sudden movement.

A figure emerged. A large, burly man. “A little rabbit wandered too far from her warren.”

She tried to summon a spell—anything—but her magic slipped through her fingers like smoke. The incantations jumbled in her wine-addled mind. More shapes materialized from the shadows, five total, circling her like wolves.

Before she could even attempt to run, rough hands seized her from behind, twisting her arms back with brutal efficiency.

Pain flared up her shoulders. She writhed against the iron grip, but her struggles were clumsy, uncoordinated.

"Pretty thing like you shouldn't be wandering alone in the dark," the voice growled against her ear.

“Move,” The gruff leader said. “Odds are someone’s looking for her.” He turned on his heel and pushed past the bushes. “Back to camp. We’ll have some fun with this one.”

They dragged her stumbling through the underbrush, her feet catching on every root and stone. But as they hauled her along, she remembered the stone in her pocket. Though her hands were tied, amidst the movement and struggle, she managed to twist her skirt in a way that allowed her to touch the stone in her pocket, just barely with her fingertips.

She forced her fingers against it, trembling. She felt it warm under her touch. It was ready to use.

“Astarion,” She whispered desperately, “Bandits… woods east of the house… please…”

One of them cuffed her across the head. “Shut it.”

But it was too late. The message was sent.

Their camp was a squalid affair. Bedrolls scattered around a dying fire, stolen goods, weapons, and a chest that lay open, filled with gold, were all piled carelessly in a far corner. The one holding her shoved her down onto a log, the leader’s eyes gleaming with delight. They were jet black irises ringed by scleras the color of old parchment, jaundiced and sickly. The rest of his face was concealed with a mask, but he removed it as he approached.

He was rugged, face worn and tired from years on the road. His hair was long and greasy, hanging in long dark, matted tendrils.

He knelt in front of her, studying her. He dragged his knuckle across her cheek, his finger like sandpaper. “Shame no one was keeping an eye on you.” He stared at her almost wistfully, and she didn’t break eye contact. When he spoke, his breath washed over her face in a wave of rot and decay—the fetid smell of someone who had forgotten what cleanliness meant. She turned her head slightly, fighting not to gag. “Lucky me though…” he drew his fingers to the ties of her bodice. “Lucky me…”

He turned to the others: “Sorry, lads. I think I just might keep this one to myself”

“I’m not so sure about that.” A voice cut through the darkness.

Astarion stepped into the firelight, and even though he was disheveled from their argument, he was terrifying. His usual charming mask has been replaced with something predatory and primal, his red eyes glowing in the dark.

“Let her go,” he said conversationally, “and I might let you keep your throat intact.”

The leader stood to face him, sizing up his opposition. He laughed a hearty laugh. “Five against one, mate. I like our odds.”

Astarion smiled, slow and cold, letting his fangs gleam in the firelight. “Five against one? Oh my, foolish man. I’ve killed more people than you’ve had hot meals.” He stepped forward, his stance shifting into one that was ready to attack. “And I haven’t fed tonight.”

Before any of them could react, he moved. A blur of white hair and deadly grace. There was a wet sound, then a gurgling gasp that quickly faded to silence. Astarion held one of the bandits in his arms, blood spilling from the gaping wound in his neck. Without breaking eye contact with the others, he bent down and fed, his movements unhurried as he savoured the blood.

After a moment he let the body slump to the ground with a wet thud. He hadn’t taken much, but the fresh blood coursed through him, and it showed in the predatory confidence that now radiated from his every movement.

“Now, I don’t like to play with my food,” he said, dragging his thumb across his bottom lip, wiping the stray blood. “But I’m feeling rather… indulgent tonight. I’ll give you a choice: run, or you can join your friend here.” He nudged the lifeless body with his boot.

The three underlings were trembling, the rattling of their rusted armour giving them away. Without a word, they fled into the darkness of the forest, crashing through the underbrush in their panic. That left only the leader.

The man’s bravado had evaporated the moment he’d watched his companion die, but desperation made him dangerous. His hand went to the sword at his side, the blade singing as it cleared its sheath.

The bandit held the sword in front of him, ready to strike, but it trembled subtly in the firelight.  “You think you can just waltz in here and—”

“Oh, I don’t think,” Astarion interrupted, circling him slowly like a lion with wounded prey. “I know.” He slowly pulled out his daggers from their sheaths. “You see, that woman you were pawing at? She’s mine. And I don’t take kindly to those who dare to touch what belongs to me.”

The bandit lunged forward with a wild swing, but Astarion moved and dodged effortlessly. He sidestepped the clumsy attack and struck back with precision, one dagger finding the gap between ribs, the other slicing across the man’s sword arm.

The leader’s weapon clattered to the ground as he stumbled backward, clutching his wounded side. “Please,” he gasped, “I’ll go…”

Astarion tilted his head slightly, like one might study a dying insect. “Now you want to leave?” he asked, voice silky and devoid of warmth. “How inconvenient. You should have thought of that before you put your hands where they didn’t belong.”

The final strike was swift and merciless.

The silence that followed was deafening, broken only by the crackling of the dying fire and her ragged breathing. Astarion stood over the body for a moment, his chest rising and falling as the bloodlust slowly ebbed from his eyes.

When he turned to her, the predator within him vanished, replaced by the vulnerability she knew so well. He quickly moved in front of her, crouching and reaching around to cut her bonds. “Are you hurt?” He asked, his voice soft now.

She shook her head, unable to find words. The ropes were cut. She pulled her arms front and rubbed absently at the raw marks they left behind.

As he knelt before her, grief, regret, and guilt welled up inside her heart. A lump formed in her throat and tears brimmed her eyes. “Astarion… I am so, so sorry.” She whispered, words tumbling out. She was still intoxicated, and he could tell. “I didn’t mean any of it I promise.”

“Shh,” he said. “We’ll talk, but not here.” He stood up, eyes grazing the sky. It was getting lighter. “We need to go.” The first pale threads of dawn we beginning to encroach.

In one fluid motion, he swept her into his arms, her weight seeming to mean nothing to him. "Hold tight," he murmured against her ear.

He rushed through the forest, swift as a shadow, his steps silent despite his supernatural speed. Trees blurred past them in the growing light, and she buried her face against his neck, breathing in his familiar scent beneath the metallic tang of blood.

When they reached the house, she caught sight of the shattered goblet glinting on the cobblestones, wine staining the stones like spilled blood. The reminder of their fight twisted something painful in her chest, and she pressed closer to him.

He didn't set her down until they were in their bedroom, and the sight that greeted them made them both freeze. The bed was out of place, things from the closet were thrown about, evidence of her frantic wine-fueled search for signs of his supposed infidelity. The bed was stripped bare, pillows and duvet in a heap beside the wardrobe. He was about to comment when his eyes darted to the window.

"The sun—" he started, but a shaft of golden light chose that moment to slice through the gap in the curtains, catching his hand. He hissed, jerking back as his skin began to smoke. He placed her down gently but hastily.

"Damn it." Moving with desperate efficiency, he yanked the heavy curtains closed, plunging the room into merciful darkness. For a moment he stood there, cradling his burned hand against his chest, his breathing ragged.

The silence stretched between them. She watched him from where she stood beside the bed, guilt and shame mixing with exhaustion in her chest.

Finally, he moved, gathering the scattered pillows and duvet from the floor with careful precision. "We should rest," he said quietly, not meeting her eyes as he began remaking the bed. "It's been... a long night."

When he turned to face her, his expression was unreadable in the darkness. "Your dress," he said softly, taking in the dirt and tears in the fabric, the way it hung askew from their ordeal. "You're hurt."

She looked down at herself—scratches on her arms, bruises forming where rough hands had grabbed her, the wine stain down the front of her bodice. "I'm fine."

"No," he said firmly, moving toward her "You're not."

His fingers found the fastenings of her dress, working with practiced care. The ruined fabric fell away, and she shivered as his eyes swept over her—cataloging each scrape, each darkening bruise. His jaw tightened.

He disappeared into the washroom and returned with a damp cloth. Kneeling before her, he cleaned the dirt and blood from her scratches with tender grace. When he reached a particularly deep scrape, she winced, and he paused.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

"It's not your fault," she said softly.

When he finished, he retrieved her nightgown from the wardrobe and helped her into it, his movements careful and respectful. "Better?"

She nodded, suddenly feeling very tired.

He moved to his own side of the room, undressing with methodically before pulling on his sleeping clothes. When he slipped under the covers, he maintained a careful distance between them. The space felt like a chasm.

She couldn’t bare it. She closed the distance, shuffling closer to him, her head pressed against his back between his shoulder blades. She wrapped her arm around his waist, pulling herself even closer to him. He hesitated for a moment before grabbing her hand and pulling it up to his chest, cradling her forearm as she drifted off into sleep.

She woke to the familiar weight of darkness pressing against the heavy curtains, but the bed beside her was cold and empty. Astarion was already up, she could hear him moving about in the adjoining room, the soft rustle of fabric and quiet footsteps.

The events of the previous night came flooding back in a rush: their fight, her flight into the woods, the bandits, his rescue. Her body ached in places she'd forgotten about, bruises blooming purple-black against her skin where rough hands had grabbed her. And her head hurt.

"You're awake." His voice came from the doorway, soft and careful. He was fully dressed, she noticed,  nicer than usual, but immaculate as always, and his hair perfectly styled. There was something different about him tonight, an energy that seemed to vibrate just beneath his composed exterior.

"How long have you been up?" she asked, sitting up slowly.

"A while." He moved into the room with that fluid grace of his, but she caught the nervous flutter of his fingers, the way his eyes wouldn't quite meet hers. "The sun set an hour ago.  I wanted to let you rest."

The careful politeness was still there, that awful distance that had settled between them like a wall. She wanted to say something—apologize again, explain herself, anything—but he spoke first.

"There's something I need to show you," he said, and there was something in his voice she couldn't quite place. Nervousness? Anticipation? "If you're feeling well enough, that is."

She studied his face, searching for some clue about what this was about. "Show me what?"

"You'll see." He offered her his hand, and when she took it, she felt the slight tremor in his fingers. "Please. Trust me."

They dressed in silence, the weight of unspoken words heavy between them. He led her outside into the cool evening air, past the garden where moonlight painted everything silver, down a path she'd never noticed before.

"Astarion, where are we—”

"Almost there," he murmured.

The path opened into a small clearing she'd never seen, and she gasped. Dozens of candles flickered in glass lanterns, casting dancing shadows across the grass. Rose petals—where had he gotten roses? —were scattered in careful patterns, and in the center of it all stood a single chair draped in silk.

"Sit," he said softly, guiding her to the chair. "Please."

She sank into it, bewildered, watching as he began to pace in front of her. His usual confidence seemed to have deserted him entirely.

"I need to explain," he began, his voice tight with some emotion she couldn't name. "About these past few weeks. About why I've been... distant."

He ran his hands through his hair, destroying its perfect styling. "Gods, where do I even begin? You have to understand—for two hundred years, I had no control. None. Every decision was made for me, every action dictated by someone else's will. And now, finally, I have the chance to choose something for myself. To do something right." He paused, his crimson eyes finding hers with desperate intensity. "The first real choice I made was you, choosing to trust you, to love you. And now... now I want to make my second choice…”

He stopped pacing and looked at her directly for the first time that evening. "This had to be perfect. You deserve perfect. After everything you've done for me, everything you've given me, your patience, your love, your trust… I couldn't bear the thought of getting this wrong."

"Getting what wrong?" she whispered, though part of her was beginning to understand.

"I've been researching for months," he continued, the words tumbling out now as if a dam had burst. "The best jewelers, the rarest stones, the most romantic locations. I've read every book on courtship rituals I could find, consulted with merchants from here to Waterdeep. I needed to know everything, needed to plan every detail, because I couldn't—I wouldn't—let this be anything less than what you deserve."

He pulled something from his pocket, a small red velvet box that made her breath catch in her throat.

"But then I started second-guessing myself. What if I wasn't enough? What if, after everything, you realized you could do better than a… vampire spawn with more baggage than a traveling merchant? What if you said no?"

His voice cracked slightly on the last word, and she saw the fear in his eyes: raw, vulnerable fear that he was trying so hard to hide.

"I know I've been secretive, and I know how that must have looked. Especially given my... history. But every time I tried to act normal around you, all I could think about was this moment, about whether I was worthy of asking for your hand, about whether I'd chosen the right ring or the right words or the right—"

"Astarion." She stood up, reaching for him, but he ushered her back down.

"No, please, let me finish. I need to say this."

He dropped to one knee then. "Remember when we were in that dusty old library in Candlekeep, and you were reading about rare magical artifacts? You got so excited when you found that passage about the Hearts of The Heavens - going on about how they were said to contain actual trapped starlight, how the colors moved like living things…"

Her breath caught in her throat.

Opening the box with a careful motion, Astarion revealed what he had been keeping concealed for the past few weeks.

Inside lay the most beautiful ring she’d ever seen. A perfectly clear stone that appeared flawless as crystal, but as the candlelight touched its surface, it came alive with color. Flecks of every hue imaginable dancing like tiny flames within its transparent depths, while swirling galaxies of silver and gold light moved between them like captured starlight.

“I love you,” he said simply. “I love your kindness, your strength, the way you see good in everyone—even in me. I love how you make me feel human again, how you’ve taught me that I’m worthy of gentleness, of care, of love. I never thought I’d have the chance to choose my own future, but if I have that choice, I choose you. Every day, for the rest of whatever life we have together, I choose you.”

Her breath caught as she truly looked at the stone, recognition dawning. “Astarion…” Her voice was barely a whisper. “A Heart of The Heavens… it’s… it’s not possible. There's said to be only three in existence…” She looked up at him, eyes wide with disbelief, then back at the stone as more colors rippled through it’s depths. “This is impossible… this stone is priceless…” Her voice broke completely

"This belonged to Cazador. I found it in his collection after... after everything ended. I almost sold it… I didn't want anything that reminded me of him. But then I remembered how your eyes lit up when you mentioned these stones, and I realized... this could be something different. Something ours. Taking something from that monster's hoard and making it into a symbol of the love that saved me from him…there's a certain poetry to it, don't you think?"

He looked at her, his voice growing softer. "I wanted you to have something extraordinary. Something that matches what you've given me. Though, I don't think there's anything in this world that would truly match that."

He cleared his throat, his voice steady now, all his earlier nervousness replaced by quiet conviction. "I couldn't bear the thought of letting something so beautiful remain tainted by his memory. But with you... it becomes something pure again. Something worthy of the love you've shown me."

The words hung between them as he waited expectantly for her reply. Suddenly, she was sobbing great, heaving sobs.

“Oh gods, Astarion, I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry.” The words tumbled out between gasps. “What I said to you yesterday, bringing up Cazador, your past. About you choosing your prey – gods, how could I say that to you? How could I be so cruel?” She pressed her hands to her face, tears streaming through her fingers. “You were planning this the whole time! Planning our future together, and I accused you of the most horrible things. I weaponized your trauma against you.”

She looked up at him. He was still waiting expectantly, the box open in front of her. She looked at the beautiful ring and began crying harder before looking back at him. “I was so scared you were going to leave me that I said the one thing that might actually make you want to.”

Her voice cracked completely. “You’ve spent the last two years showing me who you really are, and the moment I got scared I threw it all back in your face. I don’t deserve you. I don’t deserve this.” She gestured to the ring. “I don't deserve your forgiveness, but I'm begging for it anyway because I love you more than I've ever loved anything in my life and I can't bear the thought of losing you to my own stupidity.”

He was quiet for a moment, watching her cry, expression unreadable. When he finally spoke, his voice was soft but steady.

"What you said... it did hurt. More than I thought possible." He reached out, gently wiping a tear from her cheek with his thumb. "For a moment, it felt like you saw me exactly the way everyone else does—as the monster Cazador made me.” He paused, taking a breath before continuing. “I’m still recovering from that. I think about it from time to time…” But then his eyes met hers again. “But then I realized, you weren’t speaking to me in that moment. You were speaking to your own fear. The fear that people that love you will eventually leave you or betray you.”

He traced a thumb along her jawline. “I know that fear, darling. I’ve lived with it for centuries. It makes us do and say terrible things.”

He leaned closer, his forehead nearly touching hers. “One night of cruel words does not erase two years of love, patience, and acceptance. It doesn’t change the fact that you’re the first person who ever made me feel worthy of devotion and love instead of desire. I forgive you”

He picked up the ring out of the box and held it between them. “Will you choose to trust that I will never, ever leave you?” His crimson eyes held hers steadily, “Will you be mine, forever?” then came the words:

“Will you marry me?”

"Yes," she whispered, the word barely audible through her tears. "Yes, a thousand times yes. Forever. In this lifetime, and the next, and every one that comes after."

He slipped the ring onto her finger with care, the stone of legendary beauty catching the candlelight and seeming to glow from within.

Then she was in his arms, kissing him with desperate relief and overwhelming love. He kissed her back just as fiercely.

“My betrothed…” he whispered against her lips. He pulled back just enough to meet her eyes, tears still clinging to her lashes. “Let me show you just how much I love you. How much I want to spend forever proving it.”

She nodded, hands already reaching for him as he gathered her closer. The candles fluttered gently while the moon and stars shone overhead. As his lips found her throat, as his hands began exploring, she pulled back with a shaky breath.

“Take me home,” she whispered.

“As you wish,” he murmured, “my love.” And in one fluid motion, he swept her into his arms.

The cottage door barely had time to close behind them before she was pressed against it, Astarion's mouth claiming hers with desperate hunger. Her hands tangled in his silver curls, pulling him closer as she arched against him.

"I love you," she breathed between kisses, and he pulled back to look at her, his crimson eyes soft with wonder even as they burned with desire.

"And I love you, darling. More than I ever thought possible." His thumb traced her cheek tenderly before his expression shifted to something darker, more promising. "Now let me show you exactly how much."

He lifted her again, carrying her toward their bedroom with reverent care, the stone on her ring catching the moonlight that trickled through the windows one last time before they disappeared into the welcoming darkness beyond.

He brought her to the bedroom, placing her gently on the bed as if she was a fragile porcelain doll. He hovered over her for a moment, then, bending down, he kissed her hungrily. He pushed her ever so slightly, giving her the indication to lie down.

She slowly fell back on the bed, then they parted.

His palms were planted on either side of her shoulders, staring down at her with loving eyes. His gaze roamed around her face, memorizing it though he had seen her thousands of times before

Tonight, things were different.

And, gods, she was more beautiful than ever. Cheeks flushed with desire, hair fanned across the sheets like spun silk. The curve of her lips, her elegant cheekbones, the delicate place just beneath her ear where her pulse beat soft and sure. There was a small mark there from the last time he'd fed from her, nearly faded now but still visible to his keen eyes.

The moonlight filtered in through the window, casting silver light across the room and painting him in ethereal beauty. He looked like something sculpted by the gods themselves, all sharp angles and pale perfection. And yet his expression, his reverent silence, was the most radiant thing about him. His eyes, those bottomless garnet depths, were so full of love and wonder it took her breath away.

She’d never seen him look at her like that.

Her hand rose, drawn to him hypnotically, and brushed along his jaw, her thumb tracing the sharp hollow below his cheekbone. He leaned into her touch with a soft sigh, eyes half-lidded but never breaking contact with hers. He exhaled slowly, before lowering himself to find her lips.

He started light, as if kissing her with too much intensity now would shatter the spell they'd woven around themselves. His lips moved against hers with careful devotion, tasting and savoring rather than claiming. But when she responded, her mouth opening beneath his with a soft sound of need, something in him unraveled. The kiss deepened, became something desperate and consuming. His tongue swept against hers as his hand cupped her cheek, before threading his fingers through her hair. He kissed her like she was air, and he was drowning, like she was salvation and he'd been lost for centuries—which, perhaps, he had been.

He pulled her back up, so she was sitting now. His lips were still moving against hers as he let his hand glide across her breast, then her ribs, finally settling on her waist. He gripped her firmly as he pulled away.

Her heart leaped to her throat as his hands found the hem of her nightgown. He slowly began pulling it up, and she let him take it off her, baring her to the cool air of the bedroom.

She breathed, slow and patient as the air became thick with the kind of anticipation that bloomed in the chest and fluttered behind the sternum like wings. Her heart was pounding, and he must have felt it as he pressed a kiss just above it, the tenderness of it making her skin tighten. Her hands fisted the sheets, grounding herself.

Even after two years together, after countless nights of intimacy, she still felt that flutter of shyness when he looked at her like this. Tonight especially, when his gaze held such profound reverence, such worshipful attention that made her feel both utterly cherished and beautifully exposed.

“You are beautiful, you know that?” he said simply, drinking her in.

The heat rose to her cheeks faster than she thought possible. She pulled her hands to her face in embarrassment, but he stepped forward, kneeling as he gently grabbed her wrists. “Don’t hide yourself, my love. I want to look at you.”

Her blush deepened as she ducked her head against his shoulder, overwhelmed by the intensity of his gaze. He chuckled softly, the sound vibrating against her skin as he tilted her chin up to capture her lips again. She melted into him as his mouth moved against hers, tender at first, then with growing passion. His hands traced paths along her bare skin before settling at her hips, drawing her closer until there was barely space between them. As the moments stretched, his touch like fire against her skin and their lips moving in perfect harmony, her embarrassment melted away entirely, replaced by pure, aching desire that pulsed from her core.

Her trembling fingers found the collar of his shirt, working the clasps with careful deliberation, one by one, until the fabric fell open completely. She let her palm glide across the cool expanse of his chest, trailing lower and lower until she reached the ties of his trousers. With gentle fingers, she pulled at the string, the bow coming apart effortlessly under her touch. Her hand slipped inside, finding him through the thin fabric beneath, and she felt him draw in a sharp breath at her touch.

He stepped back just enough to look at her, his gaze drinking her in completely. "You take my breath away," he said softly, "Every single time."

He undressed next. No haste, no pretense. Each piece of clothing slipped from his body and was tossed aside on a nearby chair.

He pressed his lips to her again, desire evident this time in the way he moved. It was predatory now but still held the same softness and care – almost like he was fighting with himself. Holding back.

His lips moved against hers with desperate hunger, and he guided her back down to the mattress carefully, one cool hand pressed to the small of her back. As she sank into the softness beneath her, he moved with fluid grace, positioning them both at the center of the bed before settling above her. Her hands explored him freely, tracing the planes of his chest, the corded strength of his biceps, finally threading through the silver curls at the nape of his neck. She gripped his hair like it was her lifeline.

Astarion was rarely vocal in his pleasure, but when her fingers scraped gently against his scalp, he let out the softest sound against her lips, barely more than a breath, but it sent heat racing through her veins like molten gold.

They parted; she gasped slightly. He moved down slowly, dragging his lips across her skin delicately, peppering kisses on the way down: on her jaw, her neck – stopping momentarily, as if contemplating whether to have a taste, then to her breast, sucking softly. Just enough to draw a quiet involuntary sound from her lips. She clutched at his shoulders, her breath catching in her throat as he lavished attention there. The graze of his fangs was barely perceptible, but still just there. His tongue circled her nipple, lazy and languid, until her hips shifted beneath him without thought.

He moved lower yet again, pressing a kiss to her stomach, then her hips. He kissed lower and lower, his cool hands coaxing her thighs apart tenderly and gently. When his mouth reached her core, he didn’t dive in, he paused, long enough for her to go still. His eyes met hers for just a moment, sending something electric down her spine, before he began.

He kissed her as if she were something to be worshipped. Soft, fluid strokes of his tongue, precise and deliberate There was no haste in his movements, only the patience of someone who had all the time in the world. He savored her slowly, building her pleasure with care as he held her open with gentle hands. Her fingers found his hair again, twisting gently, her lips parting, a hush of pleasure escaping them.

He gently moved a hand from one of her thighs to her opening, sliding a finger slowly inside her warmth. Her breath hitched at the intrusion, back arching as he began a slow deliberate rhythm. He worked her carefully, skillfully, adding another finger when she was ready, stretching her further while his tongue never faltered in its attention.

Every nerve in her body felt alive, pleasure radiating from where his tongue and his fingers were working with such skill. His rhythm was perfect, each press of his tongue, each movement of his fingers driving her closer to the edge. He pushed his fingers further, curling upwards to hit her sweet spot. Her hips involuntarily bucked. He hummed in response, moving his hand from her thigh to her pelvis, holding her down, the gesture only adding to the pleasure.

Then he pressed his tongue flat against her, one long languid lick, and his fingers curled just right, and she melted.

She came with a breath that sounded like his name but fell short as she was overcome with pleasure. The warmth overtook her, wave after slow rolling wave rolled through. He held her through it, tongue never ceasing movement, easing her through her release. He coaxed out every last tremor until her back finished arching and she settled back down on the bed, boneless and blinking.

He pressed a kiss to her thigh one more time before he rose.

When he returned to her, it was as a man undone. His eyes were dark with pure loving desire. He positioned himself above her, kissing her lips with fervor as he guided himself to her entrance, his other hand steadying himself beside her head. Her hands found his nape again, tugging gently at his curls once more.

Then with one sweep, they joined, slow and steady. The sensation was otherworldly, her breath catching as he filled her completely. He brought his other arm to the other side of her head and lowered himself onto his forearms, bringing them closer together. He stilled with a quiet, exhaled sound against her lips.

“Gods,” he whispered, “I can’t believe you’re all mine.”

“I will always be yours,” she breathed, closing the distance between their lips. Slowly, tenderly, savoring every last drop of each other.

He parted their kiss, burying his head into her neck, drinking in her scent before he began to move. A slow rhythm, a gentle roll of his hips as she gasped into his ear. Her arms were wrapped around him, one hand still digging in his hair, the other splayed across the muscles of his back, the ridges of his scar noticeable beneath her fingertips.

The only sounds were the whisper of their breath, the faint protest of the bed, and the soft evidence of their joining.

“Astarion,” she breathed. His lips found her temple in response.

He spoke through his touch. He moved a hand towards her hips, cradling it, then he deepened his movements when he felt her nails digging gently into his back. He attuned himself to her completely, reading every shift, every flutter of expression.

Pleasure bloomed within her again, bolder this time, and no less consuming. She involuntarily dug her nails into his back. “Astarion,” she whispered again, pressing a kiss to his shoulder, wanting to sink her teeth in it as he moved. He answered with a deliberate roll of his hips that drew a cry from her as he ventured deeper than he ever had before.

When release claimed her again, it was with her mouth pressed to his shoulder, her legs wrapped around him, trying to pull him in closer, and her body trembling in surrender. He held her through every wave again, never rushing and never stopping. When it was all over, she was seeing stars.

Only when he was certain she had received everything did he allow himself to follow. His release tore through him with devastating intensity, stealing his breath and unraveling him completely. His body pressed flush against hers, jaw tightening as he let out a muffled groan in her ear as he spilled into her, his face buried in the curve of her neck.

Afterward, they remained entwined in perfect stillness. He lay half atop her, one arm curved beneath her shoulders, the other tracing lazy patterns across her skin.

She turned her head, pressing her lips to his cheek. He returned the favour, bringing his hand up to cradle her face and placing a kiss on her forehead, then her lips.

His hand drifted from her face, fingers trailing softly down her neck, along her arm, until he found her hand. He lifted it, allowing the stone to glitter and shine in the moonlight that streamed through the window.

“I love you,” she whispered.

His crimson gaze turned from the stone to her eyes, bright with wonder and love. “Say it again.” The words came out almost desperate, as if he thought he was dreaming.

“I love you, Astarion. My heart, my home, my forever.”

He pressed his forehead to hers. “You know, even after two years of hearing those words, I still can’t believe you chose me. Someone who forgot how to be gentle. Someone who didn’t think he deserved this.”

“You chose me too,” she whispered, fingers tangling in his hair. “Every day you choose to let me in. You choose to be vulnerable with me, to trust me with your heart.”

He intertwined his fingers with hers, the stone seemingly shining brighter at the gesture. “Be that as it may, let us not forget that you decided to trust a monster.” He smiled.

“Ah yes, and now your my monster. My very own monster!”

He smiled brightly, laughing softly, pressing a soft kiss to her lips. “Yes, I’m your monster.”

His expression grew more serious then, vulnerable. “I never thought I could have this. Have you. Some nights I still wake up afraid it’s all a beautiful dream…” He breathed in. “Gods, if it is… I never want to wake up.”

She laughed softly. “I’m real, my love, this is real.” She brushed a stray hair from his face. “And I’m all yours. Forever.”

His laugh was soft with joy. "What a wonderful fate," he murmured, his smile radiant in the moonlight. "An eternity with the woman who saved my soul."

He inched closer, his eyes tracing her features, as if he still quite couldn’t believe she was his. When he spoke, it was barely above a whisper, the emotion seeming to emerge from the depths of his soul that was once locked away. “I love you,”

It was different than all the other times he said it in the past. Not the careful admission of the early days, when saying it with meaning felt foreign on his tongue. Not the passionate declarations in heated moments of desire. This was far deeper, akin to a vow, or a prayer. It was a promise that encompassed everything that they’d been through and everything they would face together. It carried the weight of his proposal, the weight of forever.

The overwhelming joy of knowing that she would be his forever.

“I love you, too” she breathed as he pressed his lips to hers fervently.

They held each other as the night stretched around them, two souls who had found each other in a world that had wronged them both in different ways.

It was here, in the quiet sanctuary of their bedroom, surrounded by moonlight and the gentle sounds of their breathing, they spoke in whispers of wedding plans and shared dreams, of fears soothed and promises made.

Her ring. Her priceless ring, the Heart of the Heavens continued to catch the moonlight. It would shine forever more, passing eventually into legend as a symbol of a love so pure that bards would sing of how the vampire spawn who once knew only darkness found salvation in the arms of his beloved, their story becoming as eternal and precious as the very stone itself.

⟡ ݁₊ .

a/n: woooow i have a habit of getting absolutely carried away when i write! 9k words!? FOR WHAT!?

i really hope you enjoyed it! i didn't go too crazy with the nsfw cause i think it should have been a nice sensual encounter rather than rough and wild !

sending stones - yesss i know it says only once a day but sometimes we break the rules around here <333

and the ring! i tried doing some research on other rings in dnd i thought would work but none were speaking to me, so i made one up, i kind of imagine it looks like the arkenstone from the hobbit :)

anyways... yeah!

𖤝 masterlist | ao3 | requests

[happy-beeeps]

Sweat it out

Summary: tav comes down with a nasty flu, and one of her travel companions begins to worry... and maybe realize his feelings

WC: 1.3k

warnings: none i think! idiots in love

f!tav x reader

It’s quiet outside Astarion’s tent as he paces back and forth. Halsin has been inside with you for far too long, and the lack of communication has him worried. How long has it been since he hasn’t ended the night with your words, your breath near his? Weeks, months?

He doesn’t like to think of it. In fact, he’s doing an excellent attempt at thinking about anything else as he paces, and fails to notice the clatter of their camp members walking over to him.

“Chin up soldier, the rest of us seem okay, it probably has nothing to do with her tadpole.”

“Karlach is right,” Gale agrees, “it seems unlikely that the rest of us would be spared the same fate if this truly was connected to our wormy affliction. She will pull through.”

As much as it pains him to admit it, Gale is right. For all logical sense, this should have nothing to do with the mind flayers—but the thought offers little comfort (few things hinging on Gale’s ideas rarely do.) 

It has started this morning, you had remarked how your head felt wrong. You felt wrong. You had ignored it, had soldiered on. As the day progressed, you complained of aches that had not been there, of chills that ran down your arms. Your skin grew pallor, covered in a sheen of sweat. By the end of the night, a cough ragged at your chest, and you could do nothing f else but whimper to yourself. The slightest motion had set tears out of your eyes, your skin burning itself to rid your body of whatever was happening.

Only Halsin, Lae’zel, and Shadowheart accompanied you now, the two healers were working overtime on an attempt to find your ailment, and Lae’zel was not easily persuaded to leave behind one of her dearest friends.

Astarion thinks of the dagger pressed to poor Wyll’s throat when he kindly attempt to guide her towards a spot nearest the fire.

He’s worried about you. This isn’t new, he’s made peace with the reality that he cares for you, he just hasn’t figured out how to say it. Now, he fears the opportunity may be slipping from him.

It’s Halsin’s booming voice that calms his nerves, he and the other two step out from the tent, his grin palpable even from where Astarion is standing. “She’ll be fine. It’s a nasty virus, I’ve given her a brew to aid in the healing, and I’ve created tonics for the rest of us.”

As he passes them out, Shadowheart walks up to Astarion, who is quickly making his way towards your tent. “You… don’t need a tonic. On the account of you being, you know. Not really alive.”

“You’ve got such a way with words, really,” he breathes, but his eyes flicker to the flap of your tent, “so I can go see her?”

Lae’zel speaks up, placing a firm pat on his arm as she walks by, “she’s certainly been asking for you.”

* * * 

You have two clear, feverish trances.

The first is of your mother. A memory that’s not uncommon, one you drift back to anytime you attempt to rest an illness away. Its familiarity brings comfort as you attempt to sweat this bug out, and ignore Halsin and Shadowheart’s proding over your body. 

The other is… newer. One you hadn’t expected. You’re in a secluded section of camp, feet tapping against the water, skin swathed in moonlight. Your wearing nothing other than a long, white shirt, unlaced dangerously along the neck. This is no more than two days ago. 

You follow the memory along, watch from your eyes as you trace circles along your bare thighs, until you look to your side. Astarion is there, eyes swimming with emotion, as he gnaws on his lip.

Memory Astarion reaches out, grabbing your hand, weaving your fingers together. “I’m glad you’ve convinced me to stick around after our escapades, you are entirely addicting.”

Memory you leans against him, pressing your weight against his. His skin is cool, the chill sending tiny bumps along your exposed legs. “I’m glad you’ve decided to humor me, Star.”

You’re mortified when your eyes flutter open, your mouth in the process of muttering his name, to realize he’s here. Next to you. In your tent. As you sweat through probably a third pair of smallclothes.

“You rang?” He’s cheeky when he speaks, but his hand goes to palm your stomach quickly, as if he’s checking to make sure you’re here, you’re still you. The concern is sweet, and it sends an all new kind of flush across your body.

“Feel so sick, Star.” Shit. Is that tiny little voice coming from you?

He moves then, gentler than he’s ever moved before, carefully contorting his body around yours and pressing you against him. In an instant, it’s like a salve to your soul. You’re covered in him—his smell, his weight, his temperature. The chill itself is a whole other soothe to your aches. 

“I know you are darling, but Halsin said you’ll be better soon.”

“Can’t get you sick,” a cough takes your lungs briefly, “who’s gonna pick the locks for us then?”

He laughs, and smooths a few stray hairs out of your face. “I won’t. Officially medically cleared, according to Shadowheart. On the account of my ‘not being alive.’”

You move to nod your head, but the pain makes you stop. Astarion is quick, and he cushions the movement with his hand before pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I hear you were dreaming about me?”

“Maybe. Lots of trances. You know how it goes.”

“Was it particularly scandalous? Is that why my little love is so keen to swear?”

“Don’t have it in me to hit you.”

“You wouldn’t dream of it.”

It’s a calm silence that takes you next, Astarion stroking your hair as you listen to the distant clamor of your friends. You break it, after another moment.

“I remembered my mother.”

You don’t often talk about your family, and he knows this. He moved just slightly so you can see his face, curiosity and warmth covering his eyes. “What was it?”

“When I was little, I got sick, nothing bad but still sick. My mother, she’d rub my hair and sing to me,” you pause to close your eyes, as if you could will her here right now, “she’d go to our kitchens and shoo the cooks out, she’d make me her special soup, and when she brought it to me she’d promise me she’d teach me one day.”

“She sounds lovely.”

“She was. Smart too. She always knew things about me that I didn’t know.”

“Oh, like what?” Astarion’s face shimmers with a laugh and you use the last bit of your strength to attempt a shrug and burrow into his chest.

“She used to tell me she knew I’d end up with someone older. Don’t know if she knew how old.”

After your words, as if in cue, your chest begins its steady rise and fall, and Astarion recognizes the twitch in your fingers. You’re trancing again. Which means he’s stuck with your words and their heavy implications.

Still, with the way your overheating body simmers against his cold touch, he resolved that he doesn’t mind their weight, not at all. In fact, he’d like more of your burden.

You don’t slip out of your trance that night, but feel the briefest ghost of a kiss on your forehead.

When sunlight rolls around, your eyes blink awake. You’re weak, you can feel it, but better. You go to sit up, but realize quickly Astarion’s weight is still against you, one arm cradling your head to his chest, one arm twisted beneath you. 

You’ve never quite felt so comfortable, so held. You don’t remember what you told him last night, don’t remember exactly what he said. Instead, you decided to live in this moment now, and pray to all the gods you’ll get to relive it again soon.

[aethes-bookshelf]

let me be your shelter || astarion/gn!tav

This is the result of an especially hectic exam season. I started writing this fic instead of having a meltdown lol Now that I have more time again, I decided to finish it :) I hope you enjoy!

Warnings: hurt/comfort (mostly comfort), gn!Tav (can be read as a self-insert), Tav/Reader is the one being comforted

Pairing: Astarion/Tav, Astarion/Reader

Wordcount: 1.5k

Summary: You’d always tried to be the strong, reliable one — a leader through and through, a shoulder to cry on for everyone else. Even after everything you'd been through, you put on a brave face. All the way up until you couldn't.

Luckily, Astarion's always there to pick up the pieces.

ao3 link

The sun was setting outside when you finally closed the front door of your house behind you, cloaking the entrance corridor in darkness. The straps of your pack were digging quite painfully into your shoulder, no doubt leaving angry marks on your skin. You threw it to the floor with a huff and closed your eyes for a moment,

The day's exhaustion rolled off of you in waves; hours worth of dust and grime stuck to your clothes and skin. Rebuilding the city after the Battle of Baldur’s Gate was a noble cause. It being noble, however, didn’t make it any less exhausting.

You tried running your fingers through your hair, but your hand almost got stuck in it instead. The firm tug against your scalp made your eyes water. Your back was on fire, your legs were on fire, your face was tacky with drying sweat. It was all so much, too much.

Curling up in a corner and staying there until the sun fell out of the sky seemed worryingly appealing. I still have to go back out there tomorrow, though, you thought. The ugly, choking pressure in your throat got tighter and tighter. Your eyes, still clenched shut, brimmed with tears.

‘Darling?’ called a familiar voice from somewhere on the other side of the corridor. ‘Why are you just standing there? At least light a candle or something. It’s not like you can see like this,’ the voice continued, getting closer.

There was the hiss of a match being lit; one, two, three candles lit up the darkness.

‘Well, not that you can see much with your eyes closed, anyway,’ said Astarion. All snark left his voice when he saw the first tears roll down your cheeks. ‘Oh, I wasn’t that mean, was I? Why are you crying, love?’

‘I-I’m sorry.’ Your voice broke. ‘I don’t- don’t know why, I’m just- just so…’ you trailed off as the first sobs tore out of your chest.

Just a few months ago, Astarion would be looking like a deer in headlights right about now. He still remembered the very first time you broke down after the whole Absolute-tadpole nonsense was over. After everyone else went their separate ways and you chose to stay to help rebuild the city and he chose to stay with you. Naturally.

The breakdown happened soon after. The second night the two of you slept in your brand new bed in your brand new house, the dam inside you just broke, shattered into pieces; and you were swept up in the current of the build-up grief and fear.

Astarion, as much as he loathed to admit it, panicked. He had no idea how to comfort people; after all, it wasn’t a skill necessary for survival for most of his life, so he never really bothered to learn it. He still hadn’t even after whatever the two of you shared at first turned more serious. You’d always tried to be the strong, reliable one — a leader through and through, a shoulder to cry on for everyone else. The stable one. The stable one never gets to cry, so you didn’t.

As ashamed as Astarion was when he realized it, he hadn’t even thought you could cry. It just never really crossed his mind.

Luckily for the both of you, he loved you far too much not to learn from his mistakes after that very first night of the rest of your life. He’d like to think he got comforting you down to a science.

‘Would you like a hug, my sweet?’ Step one was almost always physical contact. And not just because holding you became one of his favorite pastimes; rather, it was grounding for you to have something to hold onto when you got like this. Astarion would gladly volunteer to be that something whenever he could.

You didn’t trust your voice enough to answer, so you just nodded instead. You were starting to tremble; rarely a good sign. Whatever stress-induced breakdown was happening would probably be a big one.

Astarion knew better than to try to wrestle you from the spot you were standing in. It would do nothing except agitate you further, so he simply walked up to you and gathered you into his arms.

The moment you were close enough to hide your face in the crook of his neck, the sobs that had been building up inside you this entire time wrecked your body. You were wailing loudly; so loudly you’d be embarrassed if you had enough energy left in you to care.

Astarion winced slightly at first — you were close enough to his ear for it to hurt. Still, he held you closer, firmer. Just enough pressure to help you calm down.

Eventually, your wailing died down to sobbing, and sobbing turned into soft sniffling. He tried to run a hand through your hair; his fingers nearly got stuck in it, just like yours before.

‘Would you say no to a bath, darling?’ he said, voice soft and quiet. ‘I got some new scented oils a few days ago. I even paid for them this time.’

That got a small chuckle out of you. Your throat was raw and your face was even more sticky now; a bath sounded wonderful.

‘I’d rather like a bath, I think.’ Your voice was all scratchy. You’d probably have one hell of a time trying to speak tomorrow.

‘Come on, then.’ Astarion kissed the top of your head and gently pried you away from his neck.

Usually you were the one leading him everywhere; he supposed in moments like these it was his turn to lead you instead. He walked you to the bathroom, holding your hand. And he didn’t even comment on the snot you left on his shirt, which was a great show of understanding on his part — as far as he was concerned — although he did take it off and throw it in the laundry basket as soon as the two of you entered the bathroom. All his love for you didn’t mean he’d be okay running about in a snotted-up shirt.

He sat you down on the floor near the bathtub and filled it with water. He smelled each of the new scented oils with great consideration. The last thing you probably wanted at the moment was having to pick which oil to put in your bath, so he wanted to make the choice for you — and to make the right one.

After the bath was all prepared, Astarion helped you out of your clothes and walked you to the corner of the bathroom, where he washed most of the dirt off your skin. Making sure you could properly relax also meant making sure you wouldn’t be soaking in dirty water, after all.

Soon enough, you were sitting in the bathtub with your eyes closed. Right after helping you inside the bath, Astarion ran off to grab your favorite hairbrush. And now, he busied himself with detangling the mess your hair had become over the course of your day. He talked and talked all the while — about his day, about this awful thief he managed to thwart the other night, about the shopping trip he went on the day before — about everything and nothing, just to keep talking. Just to fill the silence with noise that would drown out your screaming, tired mind. He didn’t expect you to answer; it was enough that you listened.

After your hair was brushed, washed and conditioned, Astarion dried you off and brought you a freshly washed set of pajamas.

‘You need to sleep, darling,’ he said, handing you the clothes. He knew you were far too tired to argue with him on that. As endearing as your usual desire to stay up with him for as long as possible was, you needed rest — badly.

‘Will you stay with me?’ you said. You felt much better now that all the grime was off of you, but the thought of laying in bed alone made you want to cry all over again.

‘As if I’d ever leave,’ scoffed Astarion as he took your hand again, leading you out of the bathroom.

The coldness of his bare chest was a much needed comfort. You nuzzled closer to him as he threw a thick blanket over the two of you. He reached over to his bedside table.

‘I could read for you, if you’d like.’

You mumbled out a ‘yes’. Your eyelids were so very heavy, but the idea of hearing Astarion’s voice rumble in his chest right against your cheek sounded lovely.

He chuckled to himself. ‘You’re adorable when you’re tired.’

He started reading. You weren’t really paying attention to what he was reading, rather to the sound of his voice itself. The individual words and sentences blurred into one, continuous rumble. Listening to him speak felt like falling deeper and deeper into a pile of the softest pillows.

You were out before Astarion could finish the first fifteen pages of the book. He noticed by the end of page twenty. When he did, he gently put away the book and held you tighter against him. And he may or may not have left a few kisses on your forehead, but that’s neither here nor there.

Astarion got comforting you down to a science. And he was damn proud that he was the one you trusted to comfort you in the first place.

[deadtired-highkeyenergetic]

You're Not Alone (pt 2)

And here is the requested part 2 of vampire spawn!Tav/reader! I'm pretty sure I injected more fluff into this one after the very dark part 1.

Taglist (I guess I could do one in the future): @silverfangmarks @astarioffsimpmain

Summary: You and Astarion deal with the aftermath that is you being turned into a vampire spawn.

After the events of Cazador’s palace, the group quietly head back to the inn, covered in blood and downcast. Astarion keeps his distance from your limp body gently cradled by Halsin, gaze fixed on the ground and disappears the moment the party reaches the inn.

“Where is the vampire spawn going?” Lae’zel hisses. “He is the reason why Y/N is like this, he should be here.”

“Leave him be, Lae’zel. He’s taken the events hard, give him some space for now.” Halsin chides, setting you down on a bed. Your physical injuries can be easily healed with some blood, fortunately Cazador hadn’t gotten far with his poem before the party had crashed the ritual so your scars wouldn’t be as bad as Astarion’s but the main issue is the emotional scarring. Halsin had hoped Astarion would remain by your side so that when you woke up, he could help you but the vampire had gone off by himself and Halsin wasn’t sure when he’d return.

The druid slices open a wound on his wrist and lets the blood drip into your slightly ajar mouth. Your throat bobs instinctively, swallowing the precious fluid but your eyes remain close. At least you’re drinking the blood, that was enough at this stage. He continues letting his blood drip into your mouth until your eyelids flutter and you stir slightly.

“Y/N.” He says. You groan in response, eyes opening blearily.

This place smelled different, looked different. You were in a different place, where were you? You shoot up, eyes wide and muscles tensed, ready to fight. A quick glance around the place told you you were in a room of sorts and the only other person around was Halsin.

“Where am I?” You croak. Your body felt cold, sore and you wanted nothing more than to fall into a deep slumber.

“You’re at Elfsong Tavern’s Inn. Don’t worry, you’re safe now. Cazador is gone, he can’t harm you anymore,” Halsin reassures you, but keeps a distance away to give you some space. You press a hand to your head as memories come rushing back to you. Astarion’s siblings coming for him, you defending him, Cazador appearing and kidnapping you, Astarion’s cry for you, Cazador using you as Astarion’s substitute in the ritual, the pain that followed, the others rescuing you, Astarion holding you tightly in his arms, comforting you…

'“Astarion,” you whisper, “where…”

“He’ll be back soon,” Halsin says, but you can tell he’s lying.

“You don’t know!” You snap accusingly, “stop lying! Where did he go?”

“Calm down, Y/N. After we brought you back, Astarion left for somewhere, although none of us know where or how long he will be gone. He still hasn’t returned.” Halsin raises his hands in surrender. “I didn’t want to worry you after all you’ve just been through.”

“It’s just that simple! Just tell me! Like that!” You snarl, fangs bared. Halsin leans away so that your fangs are far enough from him and you realise what you’ve just done.

“I’m sorry. It’s not even your fault.” You sit back down on the bed, shoulders hunched. “Everything’s been so…much.”

Halsin shakes his head, “it’s quite alright. You have a lot to adjust to, with your new…condition.”

“At least the tadpole still lets me walk in the sun,” you give a hollow laugh, “if Astarion’s ability to do so is anything to go by.”

You smile sadly at the bed beneath you. “Things can never go back to the way it was, and I was so looking forward to doing so many things once we had our tadpoles removed too.”

Halsin remains quiet and you sit there in the silence with him, tears sliding down your cold cheeks. You curl up, hugging your knees to your chest, causing tears to stain your kneecaps. The warmth you once had is all gone now, replaced by a chill that reminds you of what you have lost, of what you once had.

“Are you still hungry?” Halsin quietly breaks the silence, extending his wrist towards you. You shake your head despite the sanguine hunger gnawing at you, afraid of what the act of feeding solidifies.

“Then I will take my leave first. Call me if you need anything.” The druid rises from the stool, sending you a look of concern but leaves you with your thoughts.

You stare at your hands, your cold undead hands and bite your lip. Your new fangs pierce through skin with ease, drawing a little blood and your nostrils flare instinctively at the scent. The sanguine hunger roars again, louder this time. It craves blood, it demands blood but you force it down as far as it can go. You hate it, you hate your new condition. You hate the thought that once your tadpole has been removed, you’ll never be able to enjoy the sun again, feel its warmth. You finally truly understand why Astarion had been so adamant about ascending, the temptation to do the same is strong.

Suddenly, a new scent floods your nose.

“Who’s there?” You call, glaring in the direction of the scent. Astarion steps into view, smiling a little too widely — a sign that he was nervous.

“You’re awake, darling. That’s good.” He moves to sit on your bed. “How are you feeling?”

“Like I’ve just been turned into a vampire spawn?” He flinches at your words and you wish you could take them back.

“Sorry.” You mutter. “It’s just…a lot to take in.”

Astarion quietly looks down, fidgeting. The silence between the two of you isn’t the comfortable kind, the tension in the air waiting for one of you to cut it so you decide to take the initiative.

“What’s it like, being a vampire spawn. Is there anything I have to take note of?”

“It’s…something that takes time to get used to.” Astarion murmurs.

“Well, good thing I have you to guide me, don’t I?” You smile, reaching over to take his hand in yours. Both your hands are cold now, freezing to the touch, reminding Astarion of one more thing he has lost to Cazador.

“Even when permanently dead he still haunts me,” Astarion mutters, squeezing your hand tightly. “How badly did he scar you?”

The concern in his ruby red eyes is genuine, a softness you’ve missed filling the crimson orbs. You turn around despite everything in your body screaming at you not to, feeling yourself shake as you slip your top off, flashes of memories you’d rather keep buried burning through your mind. Astarion suppresses the angry growl that threatens to spill from his throat, hatred for Cazador burning once more and wishes he could drag the vampire lord from wherever dead vampires went just so he could make Cazador pay with pain a million times worse than yours.

You swallow as bile rises to your throat, the overwhelming scent of your blood filling your nose, screams of pain flooding your mind, then the scent you’ve saved as Astarion’s fills your nose as he wraps his arms around you, whispers of love falling from his lips.

“It’s alright darling, I’ve got you. I promise you’re safe. Focus on my voice, breathe together with me.” He whispers into your ear. “In…out…in…out…”

Through the haze, you struggle to regain control of your body, tears blurring your vision once more but with Astarion’s help, you find a breathing rhythm and grasp tightly onto it.

In, out. In, out.

When the room shifts back into focus, you realise that the scent of your blood wasn’t just a figment of your imagination. Long claw marks decorate your arms, your clawed fingertips stained crimson while the sheets beneath soak up whatever has dripped onto it.

“Shit, I’m a mess,” you whimper.

“Everyone is,” Astarion reassures you, pulling a bottle out. “Here, you’ll need to drink this. All of it. Don’t leave a single drop.”

The sweet scent of blood fills the air as he uncorks the bottle and your hunger growls, eager to lap it all up but you push his hand and the bottle away. “I’m not hungry.”

“Don’t be stubborn,” Astarion scowls. “I’m not going to let you starve yourself to death, trust me, you do not want to be starving as a vampire. It’s worse than death.”

“I don’t want to drink another person’s blood,” you croak weakly. The very thought of doing so makes you want to vomit, but your body says otherwise.

“It’s bear blood. I went out to hunt and came across a bear,” Astarion swirls the bottle. “I promise I’m not lying.”

You cautiously take the bottle from him, lifting it up to your lips. You have to trust him on this, it’s not like you know how bear blood smells like as a vampire. Locking gazes with him, you tilt the bottle, letting the sweet liquid wash down your throat. Strange new flavours burst in your mouth but it’s a pleasant taste and sends a tingle down your spine. Soon, you’re greedily sucking the bottle dry until there is not a drop left.

“There, not so bad, is it?” Astarion leans in to give you a peck on your cheek. “Now, your instincts should help but this is the best place to drink from on a wrist.”

He points to a spot on his wrist and lifts it up to your lips, “give it a try.”

You eye him warily and he sighs at your reluctance, “I can’t keep giving you bottles of blood to drink from, love. You’re going to need to learn how to feed yourself.”

“But I don’t want to,” you mumble. Astarion frowns but doesn’t push the matter further, instead he reaches for the medical kit Halsin has left behind and starts to clean up the dried blood on your arms. You let him, silently watching as the cloth starts to turn brown.

“There, all beautiful and blemish-free again,” he presses kisses along the length of both your arms, tossing the cloth aside. “Being…this doesn’t change anything about you, love. You’re still the same person, and that is more than enough for me.”

He cups your cheeks, letting his thumbs run over the skin of your cheeks. Leaning in, he presses his forehead against yours and feels you wrap your arms around him. With a small smile, he pulls you in, feeling your head rest on his shoulder as he embraces you tightly, breathing in your new scent. One of his hands gently rests on the back of your head, fingers running through your matted hair.

“You’re not alone. I’ll always be here for you, right by your side whenever you need me. That I promise. I won’t let you go through what I went through, I won’t let you be alone in this.” He swears, holding you tightly. “We’ll face this together, side by side.”

You clutch desperately at his tunic, crying for what feels like the millionth time today into his chest and he lets you, ignoring the way your tears dampen and stain his clothes. Instead, he curls around you, wishing he could shield you from the world and the suffering he knows is to come and cherishes the way you cling onto him, the way you so clearly trust him with everything you have. No one had ever bared their soul like this to him, even all his prey had always kept a thing or two from him, no matter how sweet the lies he used to ensnare them.

You were different. You had let your walls down around him, bared your sweet neck at him, let him drink the first night he had tried drinking your blood instead of staking him on the spot and in return he had fallen for you. He let you have his back, let you into the shattered pieces he called his heart and let you see his broken self, hoping it wouldn’t scare you off and it hadn’t. Now you were the broken one and you had let him see it all, returning the favour was only natural but it wasn’t the only reaosn he was doing all this. He wanted to help you without needing anything in return, he wanted to see you smile again, he wanted to…he wanted to show you how much he truly loved you.

He had changed, that much he knew. It wasn’t long ago when he’d have chosen to ascend no matter the cost, but that night when he had seen you bound by glyphs with Infernal being carved into your back, all he could think about was how if he ascended you would be sacrificed too. He couldn’t bring himself to do that, he couldn’t sacrifice you no matter what he would gain in return.

He wouldn’t have needed to consider that if you hadn’t been turned into a vampire spawn.

Years of self-hatred gnaw away at him, reminding him of his failure, hisweakness that had led to this whole mess. If only he had been stronger, faster, better, then maybe you wouldn’t have to suffer his fate, the fate of a vampire spawn. His thoughts tear into him again and again, berating him, a whirling wind of destruction that threaten to unravel him. Taking a deep breath, he closes his eyes, fighting the darkness that threatens to drown him. He doesn’t have time for this, he has to help you adjust, to be there whenever you’re drowning and he can’t do that if he’s wallowing in self-deprecation. Those damned thoughts can wait another day.

A quick glance down lets him know you’ve fallen asleep in his arms, worn out from recent events and he lets out a soft sigh, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

“I meant everything I said, my love,” he says, knowing you can’t hear his words but that’s fine by him. He doesn’t want you to hear his next words anyways. “I love you.”

[pheonixgrave]

Ignore It (18+)

This is really my first time posting a story to here, I usually only do it to AO3, but this is what I made this account for. Might as well start using it?

WARNINGS: Heavy smut, corruption kink, mild blood kink? (not sure about that one) Fem Tav, hetero relationship, stress fucking, not beta'd, angst, use of cunt

Smut blow the cut, please enjoy!!

Trekking through the wilderness was exhausting as is. But the bickering? That was starting to drive Tav crazy. Vampire this. Shar that. Eating magic this. Demons that. It was always something else. No matter what she did, they were always at each other’s throats. Oh the irony in that. Maybe the Illithid worm wasn’t the worst thing. Maybe this, the arguing, was the worst thing to happen to her. If she had to hear any Githyanki phrases in the next thirty minutes, she might kill Lae’zel herself. Tav was at her wits end, ready to beat her head against the nearest tree just to see if that got rid of the tadpole. It would be a win-win if it also got everyone else to shut up. 

They didn’t even let up at camp. Sure, they all had their respective tents and spaces. But the glaring. Oh, the glaring! Not a moment of peace before bed. She sat near her bedroll, closer to the fire Gale had set up. A tankard in hand, her back to the more vocal members of the party. She could practically hear Lae’zel glaring at Astarion. And Shadowheart wasn't exactly quiet about her distaste for him either. It’s not like there was an Infernal being less than ten yards away from him. Or a Warlock just across the flames. 

She very quickly downed the rest of her drink before tossing the tankard near the flames. Curling up in her bedroll, she tried to block out all of the noise and barbed words. It was currently taking everything in her to not scream at her first three companions. They had all been through something insane and deadly. Why could they not have it in them to simply get along? It felt impossible. 

Fortunately, her sour mood was noticed by her party. Not that she’d realize it at the moment. The biggest point of contention, Astarion, managed to get the courage to walk up to their fearless, albeit grumpy, leader. He nudged her with his foot. Which he immediately realized was a bad decision. Taz shot up to meet his eyes in the blink of an eye. “What do you want?”

The bite in her voice was unmistakable. But he knew how to handle it. “I want-”

“Don’t bother,” she cut him off. She never cut him off. She was more than happy to let him talk at her sometimes. The final glare she gave him was intense as she stalked towards the lake, away from everybody else. Astarion watched her walk away. Did he only watch to see her hips sway? Absolutely. But that didn’t change the fact that the Bard needed to relax. He smiled to himself before following her. “Didn’t I say don’t bother? I’m not in the mood to be your midnight snack tonight.” 

He didn’t fail to match her step. “Why darling! Do you truly think so little of me?” He pouted. 

Tav just sighed, “Take your antics somewhere else for now, Astarion.”

“Will you just sit down?” He pushed on her shoulders, forcing her down.

Much to the rest of the party's dismay, she did trust the vampire. Whether that would lead her to her own doom was yet to be seen.

Her knees crumbled under the pressure as she fell on the ground. She shot another glare in his direction but that didn’t seem to dissuade him from his plan.

“You’ve been far too stressed today, darling.” He purred in her ear, his hands never leaving her shoulders. 

“Astarion?” He continued to move her body until she was on her stomach.

“Shhh, do you trust me?” Gods, that man was always far too much for Tav.

“Should I?”

He chuckled as he readjusted himself so he was sitting on the back of her thighs, straddling her. It took every ounce of self restraint he had to not immediately rub her ass. Gods, it always looked so perfect when she walked. He took a deep breath before applying pressure between her shoulder blades. He felt her body tense before slowly relaxing. 

It wasn’t what she expected. Was he giving her a massage? His hands worked slowly from the base of her neck to her waist. And-oh? Did she just moan? 

“It’s alright, my dear, I love hearing you.” He smirked before continuing his work. He continued like that for a few moments, just enjoying the little sounds she was making. “Let's get you out of these clothes, shall we?”

She pushed him off her, rolling on her back and sitting up. “So that’s what this was? Just an excuse to get me naked?” That fire was coming back.

“Darling, if I was trying to get into your pants, I’d try flattering you more first. Unfortunately, it is difficult to get this right over your clothes.” He sat next to her, staring out at the water, just watching the water crash against the coast. “I was taught how to do this a long, long time ago.”

She stared at the rogue before swallowing. The tips of her ears and the back of her neck were flushed. But she did trust him. He would say if this was untoward. Right? With a shaky breath, she sighed but said “Alright.” 

Astarion watched her shaky hands start to untie the little knots holding her bustier. His mouth started to water, but he had patience. As she shrugged the last of her tunic off, she covered her chest and turned the other way. He did manage to lay down her tunic so she wasn’t just laying on the dirt anymore. She laid herself in front of him. He could feel how shaky her breath still was as he climbed on top of her once more. 

He resumed his previous work, addressing the knots in her lower back. The elf’s skin was so soft, so warm. He found himself just getting lost in the feeling of someone trusting him. It was a strange feeling but a welcome one. 

Tav, on the other hand, was getting lost in his touch. His cold hands worked their way up her back and she liked it far more than she thought she would. What started off as little moans slowly became louder. It didn’t help that he was an expert with his hands. And her mind started to trail off to things that were unbecoming of a lady.

But Astarion could feel her thighs clench. No matter how she tried to move without him noticing too much. Gods, he could almost smell her arousal. Over 200 years old and here he was, still trying to keep himself from getting hard. But then she moaned his name. And what little restraint he had disappeared. He put his hands near her head before leaning down towards her ear. “This wasn’t an excuse to see you naked but you are making it very hard to not act on my…baser impulses, my dear.” He felt the shiver go down her spine. 

“Astarion,” she moaned again before grinding back on him. And she got what she wanted when he flipped her on her back without moving from his spot. And there she was, laid out in front of a vampire spawn with her chest bare. She looked up at him with wide eyes, unsure how to go from there. But him? He had far more experience than most. He moved faster than she thought. He captured her lips as he slotted himself between her thighs. And just like that, his hands were everywhere. 

It was like he couldn’t decide where he liked them best. Her throat? Her breasts? Her hips so he could grind against her? He just couldn’t decide. And she tried so hard to keep herself quiet. But then he moved his lips down her neck, his fangs brushing over the still healing marks from the night before. He thought about feeding for a moment, but something far more filling had his attention right now. He moved until he had her nipple in his mouth. Flicking the nub with his tongue, his hand went to massage the other one. He wasn’t gentle. No one that knew Astarion for who he was thought he was a gentle man. It was rough but Tav didn’t seem to mind. 

In fact, Tav seemed to love it. Her back arched into him. “Astarion!” And then her hands were on his shoulders, urging him downwards.

And he didn’t want to fight it. He kept moving, biting and nipping at her stomach. And then he got to her trousers. He sat up, panting and looking wild. His fangs were bared and he was panting hard. He threw her legs on his shoulders, tossing her loafers somewhere behind him. And then he went to work on the knots holding her trousers up. Which he made very quick work of. He shimmied them off her, making sure to keep her underwear on for a moment. He stripped off his shirt before returning to her mouth. 

He needed her. 

“Astarion, please, touch me.”

He was quick to snake his hand towards her cunt. And even quicker to find the spot that made her gasp into his mouth. Gods, he could do this forever. He made his way back to her neck, lapping over those same marks. Her hand tangled itself into his hair and the other gripped his shoulder with far more strength than he expected. His cold hands were a sharp contrast to the warmth of her. Her head was thrown back against the ground as she gasped for air. She was shaking. 

It was already so much for her. She had been so pent up and so angry. But the way he worked her clit? It was a way no one ever had before. Not even herself. In fact, no one had ever touched her like this before. Nothing past shy kisses or heady glances. If she had known, maybe she would have lived her life a little differently. 

But once her back arched and she cried out his name? She clenched around nothing. She felt so empty now and he hadn’t even gotten close yet. He chuckled as best he could, “Already, darling?” he muttered against her neck.

“I-” she gasped once he slid a finger inside her. “Astarion,” his name rolled off her tongue and he swore he wouldn’t mind hearing her do this forever. He could still feel her cunt clench around his fingers and he groaned. He couldn’t wait much longer but she was enjoying herself. “I’ve never-” he curled his finger before adding a second one. 

“You’ve never felt this good before?”

“Done this before,” she managed to gasp out before he curled his fingers again. 

His hands stalled for a moment and she whined. “I’m to be your first?” She nodded, wriggling her hips, trying to will him to move again. “My dear, why didn’t you say anything?” He removed his fingers and she cried out. “Shhh, I have to make a good first impression, don’t I?”

He practically ripped her underwear off. She was a virgin. He couldn’t lie that it made him even harder to think about being the only one who got to touch her. But he had to take care of her if he wanted to be the only one.

He buried his face in her cunt, holding her thighs open with his hands. Tav covered her mouth to hide her cries of his name. But it was his name on her lips. His fingers going right back inside her, where they belonged. His lips on her clit. He groaned again when she came, this time right on his face and hands. He lapped at her for a moment longer and started pistoning his fingers in and out. He couldn’t help but watch her cum make a mess of his fingers. 

“Astarion!” She cried as she came on his fingers yet again. “Please!”

“Please what, my dear?” He wiped her juices off his chin before closing the distance between them. His lips hovered over hers, those red eyes glazed over with a hunger. Her eyes fluttered open. She smiled at him, all too happy to offer herself to him. She bared her neck. And dive he did. His fangs pierced her neck once again as he drank. He knew better than to drink more than his share but he wanted nothing more than to keep drinking as she wrapped her bare legs around his waist and rubbed her cunt against the fabric of his trousers. He released her neck and practically shredded what was left of his clothing. 

He leaned back for a moment, taking in the sight. This elf, a noble from Waterdeep, was laid out before him. Freckles dotting her skin and her blonde hair spread out like a halo before him. It would be angelic if not for the blood slowly trickling out of her neck. “Astarion,” she whispered. Her voice was full of something he couldn’t quite place. Something he had pushed aside a long time ago. 

All he could do was nod before he lined himself up to her. As he slowly slid in, he swore that this was the closest he could get to heaven. 

Astarion wasn’t small. Tav could feel his cock stretching her cunt out. Why did no one ever tell her it could feel like this? She gripped his shoulders and wrapped her legs around him once more. She sighed as he finally finished. “Gods above, you’re amazing.” She whispered, almost too afraid to say it. Too afraid to say the other things on the tip of her tongue. Her eyes traveled down his body to where they were connected before looking back up at him. 

“Shit,” he panted, withholding every emotion that came flooding through him. Instead, he snaked a hand underneath her thigh, lifting it up before he began to thrust.

She thought just having her inside him felt amazing. But this angle had her barely able to breath. She threw her head back and arched into his body. It was all she could do to hold on to him as he upped his pace. Tav could barely gasp out his name as she tried to look at him. His eyes were shut and his hair was more than perfectly tousled. “Beautiful,” was all she could get out before she tightened around his cock. 

“Shit!” He followed closely behind her, seemingly unexpectedly. They laid there for a moment, just feeling each other before he slipped out of her. She cried, a palpable sense of emptiness. He watched her breath for a few moments longer, secretly enjoying his cum starting to drip out of her cunt. Normally, he’d leave. He’d get up, put his clothes back together and leave. But Tav? Something told him he couldn’t. So he grabbed his tunic and wrapped her in it before carrying her to the water. 

He tried not to notice her nuzzling his neck. He tried to ignore the praises she said. He tried desperately to ignore the draw she had on him. He tried to ignore her moan as he set her in the shallow water, gently taking his tunic off her shoulders. Instead, he sat next to her and let the water wash away the previous activities. 

[vixstarria]

Are you mine?

So I was initially going to do maybe 500 words worth of them being cute and cuddly, but then this happened. I have no control at this point, I am just the messenger. 

Astarion x F!Reader, Astarion x Tav, Astarion x Bard Tav, soft Astarion, Astarion POV 

Mostly fluff and comfort with a bit of hurt (Astarion’s past recollections), basically just pillow talk, cuddling, banter, non-explicit, no spoilers 

Very late Act 1 / early Act 2 (pre-confession). I’ve already written past this point earlier, but I think it’s such a fun time to return to for anything flirty, with Astarion being in love but being pissed off and / or in denial about it.  

Approximately 2,000 words 

AO3

Being able to get by with little sleep was both a blessing and a curse. In no time at all you were ready to take on whatever the day would throw at you. You were rested, alert, ready for battle. The downside? The amount of time you had to spend alone with your thoughts.   

You weren’t fully alone, not exactly. You laid on your side with your nose buried in her neck, one of your arms underneath the pillow, the other wrapped around her, your leg following the bend of hers like you were chasing her warmth, bare skin on bare skin, your bodies filling each other’s nooks so perfectly.  

You could have been up and doing something useful, you supposed, but you didn’t want to waste a precious second of being able to just hold her. 

You winced and sighed, having caught yourself on that thought.  

Pathetic idiot... 

The truth was, you knew you were living on borrowed time.  

Oh you toyed with the idea of amassing more tadpoles for more powers and seeing how long and how far you could take this, but in your heart of hearts you knew this was a lunatic idea. The absolute best-case scenario was that one way or another, the tadpole would be removed from your brain, removing all its benefits alongside it. 

Then, you would spend the rest of your eternal life in the shadows, forever looking over your shoulder in fear of being dragged back to Cazador.  

You would never see the sun again.  

You would probably never see her again.  

Suddenly feeling choked up, despite not really even needing to breathe, you pressed your lips against the small of her neck, pausing then landing a few more small, soft kisses along her shoulder. 

She stirred and rolled over onto her stomach, looking at you with a knowing smile through her mess of hair. 

Shit. 

“Oh... I thought you were asleep,” you said. 

“I know...” she replied, stretching lazily. “You only kiss me like that when you think I’m sleeping.” 

So many implications in that statement. Your mind immediately churned out a dozen ways to respond, deflecting, denying, joking or otherwise brushing it off. But you wanted to see where leaning into it might take you.  

“Do I..? Here, I’ll fix that.” 

You leaned toward her, placing a soft kiss on her lips. Just your lips brushing against hers, petal-soft. She closed her eyes and hummed in pleasure as you trailed your lips further along her skin, leaving featherlight kisses from the corner of her mouth further up the side of her face.  

You were careful to keep the kisses tender rather than sensual. Not something you were accustomed to, at all. She smiled and squirmed a little as your lips dipped below her jawline near her earlobe. 

“That tickles...” she murmured, making you chuckle.  

“My sweet girl,” you whispered, nuzzling her ear. 

Ugh, where in the hells did that come from..? you thought, startled. 

She noticed. Of course she noticed. 

She shifted onto her side, propping herself up with an elbow and resting her head on her hand.  

“Am I? Yours?” There it was again, that knowing, quizzical look.  

“Are you not?” you asked.  

“Hmm... How can I tell?” 

“Isn’t it obvious?” you flashed her a roguish grin, which she ignored. 

“Should it be? Is there something you’ve done to claim me as yours?” 

Her words might have stung, had her tone not been so playful rather than mocking. She was encouraging, not denying you.  

I don’t suppose she’s going to count all the unspeakable things we’ve done to each other. I guess I wouldn’t either. 

“Is that what you want me to do?” you asked, slowly tracing a finger down her arm.  

“That depends... Do you want me to be yours?” 

This conversation was idiotic. Why was it making you increasingly giddy? 

“Come now, we have been doing this for how long? Are we really going to be coy about whether or not we like each other?” you asked, trying to sound assured rather than flustered.  

She leaned forward, as if to reveal a secret for your ears only. 

“That’s not quite what we’re being coy about, now is it?” she whispered, before placing a lingering kiss on your lips.  

You were completely out of your depth in this kind of flirting, if one could call it that. Concentrating on the physical and sexual, dropping innuendos, hinting at promises you had no intention of keeping, teasing, arousing, adding in just the right amount of vulgarity to otherwise honeyed words to make them blush and stammer in trepidation... That you could do all day as an afterthought, all while mulling over something you had read earlier, or otherwise being a thousand leagues away with your thoughts.  

But this... It was like she was playing with and delicately caressing your innermost, rawest feelings, all whilst inviting you to do the same with hers. Sex was barely even a consideration. This was an entirely different dance. And it was exhilarating. 

Before you could think of what to say, she moved on. 

“You know, Lae’zel propositioned me earlier,” she said, briefly burying her face in her hands and shaking her head with a quiet, incredulous laugh.  

“She did what? ...And how did that go?” 

“It was very... Lae’zel. I wasn’t sure whether she was offering to kill me or fuck me at first. I had to politely decline.” 

“And you didn’t tell me?” you frowned. 

“Should I have?” She studied you with a curious look, resting her chin on her hands. “How would it make you feel? If I accepted her offer?”  

Like the whole world was pulled out from beneath my feet. Again. 

“You and Lae’zel? Hmm. Sounds like something I’d pay to watch.” 

“That’s not what I asked.” Her eyes seemed to be piercing straight into your soul. You had to quickly do a double-take on whether your tadpole might have been betraying anything to hers, before rebuking yourself. She wouldn’t pry like that.  

Your eyes roamed around the tent as you tried to assemble some words that weren’t too far from or too close to the truth. 

“Lae’zel is... exotic. Far be it for me to stand between anyone and such an... ‘outlandish’ experience. But I would prefer to have you all to myself, if it’s all the same to you. I don’t devote all that time to making sure that pretty head of yours stays on your shoulders just to have Lae’zel decapitate you in her throes of passion.” 

“That’s still not what I asked, but I’ll let it slide,” she rolled her eyes. “Getting a straight answer from you is like trying to seduce a blushing maiden.” 

“A riveting challenge?” 

“A tiresome one. That’s most likely not worth the effort.” 

How many blushing maidens have you seduced?   

“Alright, fine, I admit I might be a bit jealous. ...On top of being concerned for your wellbeing, darling.” 

“Just a bit jealous?” she teased. 

“Matters of honour would demand that I challenge her to a duel,” you sighed. 

“You have no honour. And she would crush you.” 

“I know. But I would die a hero’s death. Songs about me would live through the ages. ...You might need to write them for me.” 

“Sure, right after I wrote songs about how I conquered a githyanki,” she snorted. “Or perhaps songs about being conquered by one myself? I could spin it either way. Which do you think would stir more loins?” 

“I don’t know and my own loins are taking no part of this. Now are you going to keep talking nonsense, or will you go back to sleep already?” 

“Why, so you can sneak more tender little kisses on me?” she laughed. 

You didn't really want her to fall back asleep. Talking with her kept your darker thoughts at bay. What you did want, was to feel her wrapped around you again. 

“You know what? If you’re not going to sleep, you may as well carry on with your business, and I’ll meditate sitting up for a change.”  

You snatched the blanket from her, making her exclaim a sharp “Hey!” as the cold mountain air touched her bare skin, and wrapped it around yourself, settling in a cross-legged position. Moments later, she was on your lap, facing you with her legs wrapped around your hips. Just as you anticipated. You smirked and accepted her in your blanket cocoon, wrapping an arm around her waist and holding her close as you kissed her. 

“So, my blushing maiden,” she said as she leaned away from you, slightly, stretching her arms around your neck and resting her forearms on your shoulders. “It seems I have you backed up against a wall. I won’t force you – do what you will with your virtue. But you must decide. Will you give in willingly? Or deny me, and spend the rest of your life wondering: what if?” She leaned in to whisper the last two words dramatically. “I will ask you again: do you want me to be yours?” 

You wondered if she had any idea how apt that comparison really was to how you felt. 

Or how eerily similar it was to some of the tactics you yourself employed when luring in your victims. Hells, even the words were almost identical to some of the ones you’ve used. To make them surrender with reckless abandon, throwing all caution to the wind, blinded by your promises. Cattle rushing happily to the slaughter. 

You knew all this. You’d seen it countless times. But just then, you also saw there was no malice in her eyes. Only something like hope that she was trying to mask with mischief.  

Wherever she was leading you, you wanted to follow.  

“Fine,” you said softly, looking into her eyes. “I do want you to be mine. And no, I don’t want to share you with anyone.” You felt oddly elated as the words left your mouth. “I’d feel compelled to dismember any hand that touched you, so to give me a fair chance at survival, could you stay away from Lae’zel? Please?” 

She grinned and grasped your face in her hands, pressing her lips against yours. 

“Good girl,” she purred, still grinning, earning herself a sharp pinch on her bottom, making her jolt before she continued. “This leads me to my next question: do you want to be mine?” 

There it was. The trap beyond the lure. You saw it clear as day. And still, you wanted to follow her. 

“Darling, after the past 200 years, I’m really not disposed to letting anyone else claim ownership of me”. You watched her smile falter, and you hurriedly continued before it turned to sadness or disappointment, or worse, pity, and spread to her eyes. “But I just might make an exception for you… If the offer is mutual.” You took one of her hands in yours. “So, are you? Mine?” you asked, placing a kiss on her knuckles.  

Who’s backed against a wall now? 

"Of course I am. As if you even needed to ask.” She touched her forehead against yours before placing another kiss on your lips. Did she have to sound so triumphant saying that? “I am yours and no one else’s. Now you say it.”  

Ah, still me. 

Still, you fought hard not to laugh as a feeling of relief spread warmly throughout your body. You hadn’t even noticed how tense you were. 

“Alright, alright...” You cleared your throat and held a dramatic pause before continuing. “You are mine and no one else’s.” 

She let out an exasperated growl and grabbed and twisted one of your nipples. You chortled even as you yelped, grabbing the offending hand and holding it behind her back. She immediately made another attempt with her other hand, which you also successfully intercepted, now holding both her arms behind her. Refusing to give up, she went for your shoulder with her teeth, with a maniacal giggle, as you laughed and tried to fend her off with your chin.  

“Yes, I’m yours, I’m yours, you feral wildcat! I’m yours... Only yours.” you declared hastily into her hair somewhere near her ear, as she calmed down. “I mean it. Now behave! I always ask before I bite, don’t I?” you said, releasing her arms. 

She attempted to glare at you, her eyes narrowed, but couldn’t keep her face straight and broke into a grin again.  

“Well... Look at us...” she drawled, placing her arms back onto your shoulders. “Snatched up onto the nautiloid with nothing but the clothes on our backs, and now we’ve each got a whole other person.” 

She looked so pleased and happy... Why..? This couldn’t last. No matter how much you wanted it to. …Could it..?  

You were falling, deeper and deeper. 

My love... My sweet, sweet love... Where are you taking me? 

~~~~~ 

Next in series - Gentle warding bond

Want more of these two? There’s more. Series master list. 

AO3

[baldursgate3tempobsessed]

Your stories have definitely scratched that Astarion itch that I've had since I started the game!

One thing that's diffently not sat right with me at the end of the game, is how tav and the gang don't run after astarion after he loses his immunity to the sun. I would imagine that if the player character was romantically involved with the guy they would atleast try to shield or comfort the poor guy. A short drabble on that would be awesome!

That's so sad, I heard that's what happens 😭😭 I'm in act 3 and haven't had to see it for myself yet so yes, let's do some preemptive therapy there! And just warning since I haven't beaten the game yet I'm sure this will be inaccurate as fuck, but also with spoilers somehow ~

~

It was an exhilarating feeling, to win against all odds. One that Astarion had never been confident he would experience. It felt good, final. The official beginning of his new free life, even if it was bittersweet.

This was the bitter part, the end of his illithid protection. The sun was barely peeking over the horizon, and the burn was already starting. He was being an idiot, standing there with the rest of you like he belonged, waiting for the last possible second before he had to scuttle down in the darkness. But he wanted to see this out. Hadn't he earned that right?

According to the laws of reality, no. No he hadn't, because you had barely opened your mouth before the pain started to overwhelm him. The others would be able to hear it, the sickening sound of his skin crackling.

He was out of time. But before he could make a break for it, you happened. Astarion had been a little preoccupied with his impending doom to pay close attention to what you had been mumbling. But then sudden blackness was blanketing above your heads, opaque enough to make it as dark as night.

Astarion's eyes widened as the pain subsided, surprised beyond belief.

You were looking at him with concern in your eyes, gesturing to the think cloud of darkness above your head, "Will this be dark enough? Can it still get through?"

Astarion stared at you, momentarily confused on why you would do something like that. Before he remembered, oh. Yes. The extended care for his well-being was probably included in the whole love thing. Of course. Obviously.

That was definitely going to take some getting used to.

But the reasoning didn't stop an idiotic smile from blooming on his face.

You grinned back at him, somehow still managing to read his mind even without the tadpoles, "Did you really think I would forget about you?"

He had, but through no fault of your own. One of these days he was going to actually remember that he was worth the effort to keep alive.

"Thank you darling," Astarion said, ignoring the quested as he waltzed up to you. He grabbed your hand in his, bringing it up to his lips to kiss, "Just what would I do without you?"

"Speaking of," You turned to the Emperor, a question in your eyes as you vaguely waved upward, "Is there anything we can do about this particular problem?"

"The astral tadpole is still-"

"I'll pass on that, thank you very much," Astarion interrupted, cringing at the very thought of willingly letting another worm into his brain, "But I appreciate the thought."

There were worse things than living his life in darkness. And Astarion was counting becoming a mind flayer in the top three.

He watched, participated even in everyone's final goodbyes, always eyeing you at of the corner of his eye. It's not that he thought you would leave after you both declared your eternal love for each other, but... the two of you hadn't exactly talked about the specifics of the future either.

But that didn't stop you from leaving together. Astarion hadn't expected you to keep the dark cloud above his head as you walked the streets, startling nearly every passerby. But hells, the heroes of Baldur's gate had earned the right to a little strangeness.

You both had decided on going to the nearest, most windowless inn that you could find. Astarion wanted nothing more than to scrub the brain viscera from his skin and sleep for three days. Preferably with you in his arms.

But before all that... he had to know something.

The question was out of him as soon as you both were behind closed doors, "So what happens next to the great hero of Baldur's Gate? I'm sure you have something in mind."

He was just praying those future plans still involved him.

You blinked at him, head cocked like he was asking a silly question, "We go and find you a cure so you can walk in the sun again of course. What else would we do?"

That took Astarion aback, "I-Do you think that's really possible?"

"Well," You started, counting off on your fingers, "We know that illithid powers can do it. As well as devil contacts and ritualistic demon sacrifices. If that's all possible then that means there has to be something else on the other end of the spectrum, right?"

Astarion didn't exactly share your blind confidence. But you did have a point. The two of you had managed so many impossible feats in such a short amount of time. What was one more?

"I suppose there's a chance," Astarion said, hope fluttering in his chest with every word, "And if there is a chance no matter how small, I'm going to take it. But..."

He didn't want to ask, but he needed to know, "Are you sure this is what you want? I would... understand if you wanted to go your own way."

In all honesty, Astarion would not understand. He'd be absolutely furious. Especially after everything you'd been through. This was more of a confirmation for his waning self-confidence than anything else, versus a sincere to desire to let you go your own way. He had no intention of letting you go, not if he could help it.

But his near certainty in your feelings was the only thing that gave him the confidence to ask the question in the first place. And you did not disappoint.

"No, this is what I want," You insisted, reaching out to take his hand in yours, "You're what I want."

That was exactly what Astarion needed to hear. He used your joined hands to tug you closer, face to face.

"Good, because as selfless as I am, I really did not want to let you go," Astarion smiled, leaning in to lightly press a kiss to your lips, "I hope you realize that my love has made me a tad bit obsessed with you my dear."

"I'm sure it's no worse than me," You sighed, resting your forehead against his own, "You've really ruined me for anyone else haven't you?"

Astarion grinned, leaning in for another kiss. He had every intention of making it stay that way, for as long as you would have him.